Seth gets natural
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At the risk of sounding like a poof, I ordered some skin products over the "internet" the other day. Some of the older 2oceansvibe readers will recall my 2006 Badedas article, in which I explained my mother's and my obsession and quest for life's finer products. Much like mother dearest, my skin is on the sensitive side and shuns anything but mother nature's purest ingredients. Being an only-child raised in a home with 1,000 antique porcelain dolls, a fleet of Yorkshire Terriers and a couple of ducks (we've never mentioned the ducks before and I CANNOT, for the life of me, understand why I never mentioned them. I completely forgot about the very real genuine fuckshow that was the duck chapter of my life. In brief, my mother had these fucking ducks that shat EV ERY WHERE! She thought it would add a cool tranquil farm-like laid back vibe to the fountain (with cherubs) and the herb garden and the plunge pool, but it was, in fact, a COMPLETE muffshow! There is so much to say, but this was just meant to be a quick mention, in brackets. I can, however, confirm that the deceptively cute little duck phase ended incredibly abruptly one day when my aunt and her entourage arrived with their brak (mix breed) dog , called, ...wait for it...."Chocolate." The dog was brown in colour. Get it? Chocolate ran directly through the house and into the back garden whilst everyone was greeting each other and pouring aunty Pam a gin (filled up with soda water, with a DASH of Diet Coke). Everyone was about to chill out and try some of aunty Pam's stuffed eggs, when we heard a shriek come from the garden. A human shriek so shrill and haunting that we are all, since birth, instinctively aware of its interpretation. It could only be one thing - murder. Chocolate had blood all over his revolting snout, and there was a duck bleeding from it's neck on the ground. Oh my God, well you can only imagine the ensuing drama. Christ. There were tears everywhere. Chocolate was beaten, all the guests left, the the duck was buried, flowers were delivered, the other duck nearly died from pining over its late friend ("they mate for life, you know!") etc etc. Two words : FUCK SHOW. Ja, so anyway, I'm amazed that this is the first time I've mentioned those fucking ducks) certainly didn't HELP the situation.

That said, I ordered some face-wash and moisturiser from Garden Route Organic the other day (www.gardenrouteorganic.com) after an organic obsessed friend told me about it.

The package arrived yesterday.

Garden Route Organic - stunning!

Wow! Full marks for packaging! - as I opened the box to reveal the tissue-wrapped products in a bed of wood shavings! Not since our Standard 9 field trip to Geelbek with "Odd Job" had I felt so close to nature! I hid the box from the girls in the office and packed it away to take back to the Safe House where I could try it all out during and after a candle-lit bath with Santana and Citizen Cope's Sideways playing in the background. Mmm.. then I'll seduce myself..

And that's exactly what I did! I won't go into detail but I can tell you that the results were just too impressive not to warrant a mention. The face wash had tea tree in it and I can honestly and confidently say that I don't use my blemish stick nearly half as much as I used to!

You might want to check these guys out. It's natural. It's local. It's so good for you and it's reasonably priced. Plus, you can order online!

Well done, guys!

Browse range, read info and order online, my friend.
www.gardenrouteorganic.com

Seth Rotherham
Editor
2oceansvibe.com
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