We ask the readers to come to the rescue
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We've been thinking very seriously about starting an agony aunt section for this website. It seems the readers of this site are turning to Seth for advice. I believe in getting advice through public opinion and I think we can help people using a simple voting system. Just this morning I received the following :
Dear Seth,
I really hope you can help me because I am at risk of losing somebody very special. Let me explain.
I have been single for a fairly long time and have always enjoyed the status. My last relationship with a girl from Johannesburg was an emotional rollercoaster and I have been licking my wounds ever since. My fear of relationships has been present ever since that one ended. I have pretended that I thoroughly enjoyed my single status, but the truth is that I couldn't find the right person. Someone who I could talk to. Someone who thought like me. Someone who made me laugh. Someone who I could be comfortable saying nothing to. Someone with whom I could share my love for Buitenverwachting Buiten Blanc. Honestly, I didn't think it was possible.
I had flings with a few girls over the last few months and, because of my part cast-iron, part tungston bullet-proof plate I have developed over my heart, I never allow any emotions into the equation. I made a point of holding back. Girl friends of mine warned against this attitude - saying that I might end up over looking someone who is perfect for me. I was sure I would know when that special someone came along.
Then I started having something with a girl a few months back. I completely guarded myself from getting emotional, although I suspected she really liked me. I just wasn't thinking that far at the time and was so used to being single. I was so used to being selfish with my time and not worrying about anyone besides myself.
After a few months it dawned on me that the girl I had been paying hardly any attention was actually the girl I had been looking for. Right there, under my nose! I couldn't believe how obvious it was! She's beautiful, super intelligent, classy, sophisticated, caring, gorgeous, funny, and so much more. I was so excited that I had finally found clarity!
Guess what........ too little, too late! Now she's upset about how I treated her before - when I was too scared to put my emotions on the line. Oh my God! I have tried to explain to her what the reasons were and, although she has forgiven me, she still has a sour taste in her mouth. I don't blame her, any girl with a bit of self respect would do the same thing. I told her to forget about it and for us to just have a good time. It's not working. She says she needs time.
I don't know how much time she needs and I don't know what to do. I absolutely adore her and I am worried that if I continue trying I might get even more hurt. My gut feel is to keep on trying because she is more than worth it. I also very much doubt there are other girls like this. If I mess this up I may just be single for the rest of my life. I don't want to be single for the rest of my life, Seth!
HELP! Please tell me what to do!
A Fool
CAPE TOWN
Ok, 'Fool', just relax in your slacks! I see we have a problem. Just take it easy and we'll get through this together. Personally I want to smack you over the head for being such a moron, but that's not why I'm here. Seth is here to help, and help he will.
I have put together an online automatic voting system below and want the 2oceansvibe community to help this idiot decide what to do next. As far as I can see it there are only three options.
UPDATE: We asked, and you voted. After 200 votes, the 2oceansvibe community has given advice to Fool to the tune of:
43% of you said Fool should keep trying
(Don't give up, these girls don't come along every day)
16% of you said Fool should move on
(Too late, Buddy! You f*cked it up - move on, before your heart bleeds through your ears)
41% of you said Fool should stay single
(Stop whining like a big fat baby and get a round of tequila's for the boys!)
Good luck with that, Fool. And please get back to us and tell us how things went.
Seth Rotherham
Editor
2oceansvibe.com
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