Because this convenience store conveniently has samurai swords just hanging around, I guess. Hey, you guys saw Pulp Fiction, right? Apparently this robber guy had knocked over fourteen 7/11’s before getting chased around and caught by samurai-wielding store clerk over here.
Foreigners have been meddling in US affairs again and told them that they’re not allowed to have any more sweets. Except in this case they’re not allowed to have any more sodium thiopental. Sodium thiopental is the drug that US States use to lethally inject their murderers, terrorists and other beastly miscreants, and the US can’t get its hands on any of the stuff.
Well I don’t know about you, but I think marine biology just got slightly more interesting. A 2005 paper observing a menage a trois coupling between right whales recently appeared online, with photos that are NSFW but only if your boss knows what you’re looking at or has a working knowledge of whale genitalia.
Yes, our little country has its issues, but before we all start whinging like the DA on a slow day at parliament, lets just take a moment. It’s Monday, but things could be worse, at least we will never wake up to weather like this…
Being the informational leaky sieve that it is, America has blessed us with indictment documents of the 127 New York mobsters who were nicked on the good side of the weekend. The scale of this bust is huge – the largest ever, in fact. But the best thing about this new data is the sublime mafioso nicknames. Check them out after the jump.
Some frustrated Belgians put together an elaborate, televised prank to get back at unpopular phone company Mobistar by blocking off their office’s parking lot with a steel container that had a fake customer service number printed on it, and putting callers through the nine rings of customer service hell. Also the pranksters were inside the steel container.
In a bizarre incident of love-gone-wrong, a 44-year-old New-Zealand woman arrived at an Auckland hospital suffering partial paralysis. After mulling it over for a while doctors concluded that the woman had in fact suffered a stroke, induced by a hickey over a major artery in her neck.
George Clooney travelled to Sudan recently to promote peace and love and things and came back with malaria. George becomes the first celebrity to contract malaria while on a cause. Angelina Jolie always makes sure she has repellent and Bob Geldof is said to have a fierce fetish for mosquito nets. This is George’s second bout of malaria. Twice bitten, once shy. Or is it the other way around?
I mean, obviously not all of them. And I’d be surprised if any of them were here. But still, there exist about 20 bus shelters in San Francisco with touch screens installed by Yahoo! The most surprising thing about that sentence is that Yahoo! is still doing things.
Sometimes an octopus, a psychic german octopus to be specific, captures the imagination of the world. Paul was such a creature, successfully predicting the outcome of eight World Cup matches. Unfortunately little Paul passed away in his sleep last October, but fittingly a monument has been built in his honor, so our childrens children will never forget the clairvoyant mollusk.
In a story that I find both tragic and bizarre, 21 year old Marc Higgins from Bristol, Connecticut in the USA stabbed four people, killing one, for laughing at his farting.
In an incredibly sad an somewhat surreal tale, the life of one Ms. Holli Tencza of Ocala, Florida has been ruined by a trigger happy neighbour and the stupidest criminal to grace God’s green earth.
God, I hate this. Craig Rowin, this guy from the internet who used various Youtube videos to ask random rich people to send him one million dollars for no reason in particular, is now one million dollars richer. Understand that I am not so much congratulating Craig Rowans for milking the internet as I am muttering about not having done it first.
Police in Colombia have detained a pigeon that was allegedly transporting marijuana to a nearby prison. Apparently, some drug barons had strapped a package to its back and released the desperate little guy into the air, hoping that he would fly over the penitentiary wall into the open arms of some prisoners who were in much need of a spliff.
I’m not sure how to feel about this. Scottish Spirits is testing out canned whiskey in South America on the grounds that outdoor drinkers would rather not have to lug a bottle of the stuff around. You also look like less of an insane drunk if you’re taking sips from a can instead of swigs from a bottle of scotch, so there’s that.
Over the last few days many a report has been circulating claiming that the great proponent of Zimbabwean democracy and all round nice guy Robert Mugabe may be on the dying-side of things. Mugabe’s illness was reported by Britain’s Daily Telegraph; apparently he is in Malaysia, recovering from having the old prostate removed.
So tomorrow’s Martin Luther King Jr.’s birthday! Which is kind of a holiday now. And stores like to celebrate that kind of thing with sales and stuff, because that’s what the King was all about, right? Right. Which is why it is totally sensible for Thalia Surf Shop in Laguna to take 20% off all of it’s black products.
The goal here is pretty cool! Sort of. Extend your perception of time by doing new or uncomfortable things – and have more, better memories of a given day than you would if you were doing dull stuff. We like it – we’re all about extending the vibe. Even if uncomfortable things are required of you from time to time.
As part of Machine Project’s “Good People Doing Bad Things”, apparently teaching kids to break into and hot-wire cars is good for their development. The aim of the project is not so much to turn kids into deviants, but to get them understanding how cars work…
If you’re as grossly obese as this man taking a brisk walk every couple of days just won’t do when attempting to lose weight. There are a number of reasons for this, foremost amongst which are that you weigh so much that you cannot walk and if you do manage to get up your legs will sheer at the ankles.
So! Pretend we’re having that bit of dialogue from Pulp Fiction where we talk about Burger King burgers being called ‘royale’ in France, except we’re talking about North Korea, and they call them “minced meat and bread,” to avoid referring to the uniquely American hamburger. Also, this is a new thing.
Well, I guess Ryan Rusnak wins at weekends. Nice try, everybody. This dude set up his fridge to fire a variety of beers at him from across the room whenever he keys in the command on his iPhone. I mean sure, he’s choosing to have Bud Light thrown at him, but cultural differences. Focus on the potential here.
Man about town and real man’s man, Italian Premier Silvio Berlusconi is in trouble again. But luckily this time it’s only because he (allegedly) slept with a 17-year-old.
For any of us who’ve been out to a supper club or dinner venue with a beautiful lady this safety certificate from the 1940’s will prove invaluable.
Finally. Something to spend this R1.5 million I have lying around on. Lennon’s 1965 Ferrari 330 GT 2+2 Coupe (I don’t know what most of that means!) is being auctioned off in February; they expect it go for slightly more than his dark green Chrysler station wagon, which was recently auctioned off for $5,500 (ZAR 37.5k).
Now your chocolate hoovering habit is propping up the revenues of would-be dictators, more specifically, the regime of the Ivory Coast’s political limpet, Laurent Gbagbo. Feel bad. Feel very bad. And fat. Evil and fat.
Our Dear Leader, The Great and Beneficent Kim Jong Il has, after all these years of preserving its purity, seen it fit to allow his adoring public access to the great and magnificent Pyongyang Golf Complex. Players from all across the world (except South Korea, naturally) are invited to take part in the first North Korean Amateur Golf Open.
Alright so we’ve got our hands on a preview for the Fight Club Musical. You know they’re making a Fight Club musical, right? Jared Leto’s comment on the whole affair is, “It smells like disaster, but it could be genius.” We’re undecided at this point.
While the floods in Australia are devastating, there are a number of natural disasters unfolding on a significantly larger human and geographic scale – and we don’t seem to give a damn.
It’s pretty good! I mean, as lightsaber-based films go. Also, it’s called ‘3 Minutes’ which is helpful if you want the title to tell you how long a film is. They could’ve called The English Patient ‘Too Goddamned Long,’ for instance. Incidentally, is this what Glee is? Running around with lightsabers? Because then I would understand its appeal.