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World
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Buzz-Kill Benedict Shuts Down Monastery
25 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Pope Benedict XVI has shut down a famous Monastery in Rome, run by a former nightclub dancing nun. The monastery, Santa Croce in Gerusalemme, holds some of the most precious relics in the Church, but the Pope has cut the partying short.
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US Treasury Agrees To Sell $5.8 Billion Worth Of AIG Shares
25 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
The US Treasury has announced that it has agreed to sell part of its stake in American International Group (AIG), as it winds down the ownership of the global insurer it helped bail out of very troubled waters back when the financial crisis iceberg first struck.
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Awesome Footage Of Grimsvötn Eruption [VIDEO]
24 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
Hell. Yes. Filmmaker Jon Gustafsson caught footage of the Grimsvötn eruption – the one that closed all those Icelandic airports and grounded all those planes – from the apparent safey of an Icelandic military helicopter. It looks pretty cool. And I’m very excited to have written that sentence.
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Tuesday Morning Radvertising: Chubby Dudes In Amsterdam Sell Ad Space
24 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 2 Comments
Dutch advertising company Interbest gets snaps for their bid to sell ad space on highway billboards. They displayed a chubby, hairy, dude, with an article of clothing removed every day – above the tagline, ‘The sooner you advertise here, the better.’ I know fat jokes aren’t classy, but these just worked.
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Bonjour!
24 May 2011 by Seth Rotherham / 2 Comments
Naughty… I can’t carry on pretending I am dealing with ‘it’ (Winter) with you. I’m not. I should come clean and admit that I am in Provence at the moment. In Menerbes, to be precise – which forms part of the Luberon Valley or “Côte d’Azur”. I go every year as you will see by […]
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Pope Benedict Chats To Astronauts On The ISS
23 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Why? Because Pope Benedict XVI can do what he wants, I guess. He spent about twenty minutes video chatting with the crew of the International Space Station and the U.S shuttle Endeavour, conveying well-wishes for Gabrielle Gifford’s husband, and generally just shooting the breeze.
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If Africa Was Unoccupied…
23 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 4 Comments
In my Grade Eight IsiZulu class, our set book was a novel set in the early 1800s. It was a fictionalised account of what the Iron Age existence of a tribe living in KwaZulu Natal would have been like – before the white man arrived in his ships; even before Shaka Zulu’s fearsome warriors began their raiding expeditions. It was a well-written book and within its pages I was transported back to those simple years when the greatest challenge of the day was finding a cave where iron ore could be mined from. But the book was horribly flawed in one respect. Click link for more..
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Tornado Twists The Heart Out Of US Midwest [PICS]
23 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
A chain of particularly violent storms ripped through the American Midwest on Sunday. Joplin, Missouri, has become iconic of the increasingly-depressing storm season blighting the US.
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The Economist Punts Trevor Manuel As IMF Successor
23 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
What with IMF boss Dominique Strauss-Kahn jailed on sex assault charges, there’s speculation about who’ll be replacing him. Calls from non-European countries to instate a non-European head have become increasingly vocal, especially after French Strauss-Kahn’s shenanigans – so it’s interesting that The Economist looked to Trevor Manuel, among others, as a potential succcessor.
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Pensioners Volunteer To Work At Fukushima Plant In Order To Save Young People From Radiation
20 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
Sometimes fellow human beings are just…awesome. As the Japanese government struggle to bring the crippled Fukushima nuclear plant under control due to a lack of people willing to go into the contaminated area, a group of pensioners have decided to step up. Why? They are willing to put their lives at risk to save younger people from radiation.
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Too Much Viagra Might Make You Deaf
20 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Viagra might be the saviour for many men in the sack, but it turns out that man’s love-drug of choice might be causing hearing loss.
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50 Cent Cast As Blind, Mystery-Solving DJ Named Shamus Cocobolo
20 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
50 Cent has joined the cast of Odd Thomas, an adaptation of Dean Koontz’ novel, which I don’t really care about. What I do care about is the fact that 50 Cent is playing a blind DJ called Shamus Cocobolo, who will help Anton Yelchin’s “clairvoyant short-order cook” uncover a Satanic plot. No spice.
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Dramatic New Images Released Of The Tsunami Striking Fukushima Plant
20 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
The Tokyo Electric Power Company has released dramatic new photographs showing the immense power and immediate devastation the tsunami waves caused at Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant on March 11. The moment-of-impact images were taken from the fourth floor of the radioactive waste disposal building.
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Playboy iPad App Announced
20 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
It’s called iPlayboy because, well hell, what else were they going to call it? The appeal here is not so much that you get to see tastefully nude photographs in glorious iPad detail as the fact that the application offers full access tothe Playboy archives – you would own every Playboy issue ever. Welcome to the future.
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Virgin Galactic’s SpaceShipTwo Test Flight [VIDEO]
19 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Virgin Galactic’s SpaceShipTwo, the commercial spaceflight vehicle, recently had its seventh test flight, dropped from a height of 15km to see if it could adjust speed and bearing with various wing configurations. Which sounds technically fancy, but really just looks insanely cool.
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Jilted Brides And Failed Attempts At Suicide Go Together Like A Horse And Carriage
19 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
The woman in the pictures here attempted to commit suicide by jumping from a seventh-story window. Before she could let go however, other people in the building saved her. Why did she not just run and jump? Because she wanted to wear her wedding dress whilst taking the plunge and the window was a bit small. Unrequited love leads to awkwardness.
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New Candid Shots Of President Obama
17 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
The White House Flickr feed has been updated with a series of candid shots of President Obama over the past couple of weeks. Click through for shots of Obama and the family at the annual Easter Egg Roll, surveying tornado damage in the South, and hanging at the Oval Office- among others.
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Bomb Found In Ireland Hours Before Queen Arrives
17 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Police officials have said that hours before Queen Elizabeth II was to arrive in Dublin today, the army defused a pipe bomb discovered in a tote bag. The bag was in the luggage compartment of a bus on its way to the capital. Irish police are now on high alert after further scares are keeping them busy.
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Apple Approves Sugar-Daddy App
17 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 2 Comments
Wow. Alright. Apple gave the the green light to a mobile app that promises to connect rich old dudes with young women. Sugar daddies with gold diggers. Seriously. They call themselves SugarSugar, “the world’s most effective and discreet place for finding Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby relationships.”
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South African To Co-Head Goldman Sachs Investment Banking
17 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Goldman Sachs employees were told yesterday that Richard Gnodde is the new co-head of investment banking along with David Solomon and John Weinberg. Gnodde, who was born in Johannesburg, joined the firm back in 1987 and is said to have been critical to Goldman’s European acquisitions and mergers business.
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ANC And City Of Cape Town Arguing About Posters
16 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 2 Comments
This is a little like me not being allowed to have posters up in my bedroom, but less serious: the ANC has lodged a complaint with the Electoral Commission after Cape Town city workers were found removing COSATU posters campaigning for Tony Ehrenreich. Because they want their posters back, apparently.
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Chihuahua Blamed For New York Bomb Scare (Sort Of)
16 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
A chihuahua was indirectly responsible for a bomb scare at a New York courthouse last week Friday. Poor Melvin Ruffin; all he did wrong was to take a bus ride, when a Chihuahua decided that his bag was a good place to urinate on. This set off a chain of events that lead to the bomb squad being called in.
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Buy A Flight To The Edge Of Space At Auction
16 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 4 Comments
Look, I know bidding at an auction is an intimdating business. What the hell’s the deal with those wooden panels? Why is that fat man with the shiny face speaking so quickly? Why can’t I stop myself? What does he mean, “Sold”? Did I just bid away my unborn child’s tuition fees for the sake […]
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Black Woman Gives Birth To White Baby [PIC]
16 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 2 Comments
Francis and Arlette Tshibangu was in for one very big surprise just after the birth of their second child – a beautiful caucasian boy. What then was the surprise? They are both non-white, so do the math. I know what you are thinking – the answer to this mystery is that boy must be an albino, right? No so, says doctors.
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Texas Trying To Ban TSA Searches
16 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Since 9/11, flying has sucked. For all of the wrong reasons, flight security has become paranoid and despotic, and nowhere worse than the USA – where TSA agents have manhandled infants and the infirm in ‘the war on terror.’ So it’s nice to see that the Texas House of Representatives just banned TSA searches without probable cause.
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Kenyan Olympic Marathon Champion Dies At 24
16 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
The Kenyan Olympic marathon champion, Samuel Wanjiru, was killed when he jumped off the balcony of his home late on Sunday, police have said this morning. Wanjiru appeared to have suffered internal injuries after the fall and was confirmed dead by doctors at a nearby hospital.
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Cannes: Diana Film Slams Royals As “Gangsters”
13 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
At a press conference post screening, Keith Allen has insisted his documentary about the death of Diana, Princess of Wales, which screened today at the Cannes Film Festival to a select audience of invited journalists and other guests, was not “a sensationalist film”.
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80 Killed In Bombing Of Pakistan Military Base
13 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Around 65 military recruits and 15 civilians were killed in the twin bombing of the military training centre in Shabqadar, Charsadda – the first attack in Pakistan since the announcement of Osama bin Laden’s death. The Pakistani Taliban claims to have carried out the attack to avenge bin Laden’s killing.
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Dear Leader Tongue Scraper
13 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
The North Koreans are the cleanest people in the world. And nothing says clean like scraping filth off your tongue. Our Dear Leader uses the “Dear Leader” tongue scraper at least once a day to keep his mouth pure and unfettered by the air blowing from south of the border.
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ANCYL Website Hacked. Again… Again.
13 May 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
The ANCYL’s website has been suffering a plethora of minor hack attacks over the course of the last 24 hours – and by “hack attack” we don’t mean pithy insults by liberal journalists. Yesterday evening the landing page of ancyl.org.za looked like this:
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