-
Politics
-
London Teenager Drops Wii For Gun, Seeks To Join Libyan Rebels
18 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Unfortunately yes, you did read that correctly. Sam, a somewhat timid and reserved 19 year old, is standing up for what he feels is right. He has decided enough is enough and it’s time that he joined the rebel forces on the front line in the Libyan Desert.
-
The Libyan No-Fly Zone – What It Means
18 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Aside from the shit literally hitting the fan, let’s break this down and look at what it’s going to mean for the nation that is embroiled in one of the worst struggles against a dictator in history.
-
Disbanding Of Scorpions Unconstitutional, Decision Welcome
18 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Opposition parties are in strong agreement with the Constitutional Court’s ruling that the legislation providing for the dissolution of the Scorpions and their replacement by the Hawks was constitutionally invalid. In a decision yesterday, the highest court in the land found that a section of the Act in question did not allow for enough protection from political influence. Opposition parties have welcomed this decision.
-
Quarrelling Begins To Boil Around Mandela Gun Dispute
17 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Described as a holy grail for South African historians, the gun Nelson Mandela buried almost 50 years ago is nowhere near being reunited with its original proprietor. The owner of the property where the gun is supposedly buried, originally part of Liliesleaf farm, is at loggerheads with museum officials representing the Liliesleaf Trust.
-
EU Trying To Enforce Enhanced Privacy From Facebook
17 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
The European Union is attempting to establish the “right to be forgotten online,” as a legislative response to embarrassing old data – risque photographs, stupid statuses – that refuse to disappear. The proposed bit of legislation would enforce higher privacy settings and offer greater user control.
-
Grade 1 Teacher Allegedly Drops K-Bomb, No Spice
17 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
A grade 1 teacher from the Orchards Primary School just outside Centurion in Gauteng has been suspended by the schools governing body after pupils claim she called them k*****s. She now also faces a disciplinary hearing next week. Apparently she also called them “black monkeys”. But, has she been levelled with false accusations?
-
Oh Honey, This Is How You DO NOT Get The Gay Vote
17 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Chris Rock reckons that all of us have at least one gay uncle. If that is the case, the ACDP and FF+, might have just lost a lot of votes in the upcoming elections. A motion for Parliament to congratulate South Africa’s new Mr. Gay World winner, Francois Nel, has been blocked by these two parties. Gaga is not going to be happy about this.
-
Holiday Time On Election Day
16 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 3 Comments
As if we didn’t have enough public holidays already, here’s another one. May the 18th is the day of the local government elections and great president Zuma has declared it a public holiday, so we can all vote, safe in the knowledge that another day in the country’s economy won’t be productive at all.
-
Renovations To Gauteng Premier’s House, Millions Squandered
16 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Gauteng’s top brass are being flushed out again for misappropriation of taxpayers’ money. This time it’s totalling a little over R12 million since 2005 on lavish refurbishments and renovations to the official Bryanston residence of the Gauteng Premier.
-
Al Qaeda Launches Women’s Glossy Magazine
15 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Clearly not satisfied with the launch of their English magazine, Inspire, which first appeared about nine months ago, and included a feature called “How to make a bomb in the kitchen of your Mom”, al Qaeda’s media arm has followed up with a magazine for women, titled “Al-Shamikha”. Apparently the editorial team will be mixing beauty tips with lessons in jihad. No spice.
-
Float Like A Butterfly Sting Like A Bee – It’s Schabir – Now Rearrested
14 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
You may or may not have noticed the Sunday Times front cover yesterday. The headline was gripping and revealing. One usually sees this when tabloids have a secret they’re unable to keep. This time however, tabloids aside, the headline had every right to froth in its very large font. Behold: “Shaik In Mosque Punch-Up”
-
The New ANC Album – A Little Musical Propaganda For Everyone
11 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
Did you know that our ruling party just dropped their new album? It’s all part of their local elections campaign, and it’s totally awesome. No, really, forget the new Radiohead or Lady Gaga, this is what you should be listening to right now…
-
Meet South Africa’s Very Own Mel Gibson
10 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 2 Comments
He might have been competent enough to run a major theatre in South Africa, but someone forgot to mention to Matjamela Motloung that when you type anti-Semitic rants on your Facebook page, other people can also read the statement. And they can make screenshots of the rant, which can be emailed to news outlets in a heartbeat. Read the quote that got him fired inside.
-
Dalai Lama To Retire As Tibetan Leader In Exile
10 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
In a press conference in Dharamsala, India, His Holiness the Dalai Lama announced that he’d be stepping down as political leader of the Tibetan government in exile, to make way for an elected representative. He will be retaining his position as Tibet’s spiritual leader.
-
Just How Tight Are Zuma And Gadaffi?
10 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 2 Comments
Links between these two high rollers have been gossiped about and reported on before. It’s no big secret that shortly after his 2006 arrest on rape charges, JZ made a shimmy over to Tripoli for five days where he met with Colonel Gaddafi. Now JZ and the Colonel have had a little phone conversation.
-
Pop Quiz: Politician Who Called For Bill Clinton’s Head Gets Caught Out Doing What?
10 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Politicians cheat on occasion, and I don’t just mean at cards. Sometimes they sleep with people that they’re not married to. Sometimes politicians condemn their peers for adultery, only to be caught in the very same act some time later.
-
How Did The Police Manage To “Lose” 20,429 Weapons?
09 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
Top management in our extremely effective police force were asked yesterday in Parliament how they happened to lose 20 429 weapons. Click through for facepalming disappointment.
-
Lion Cited For Voter Registration Intimidation Over The Weekend
08 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
That is correct. A real lion has been fingered (no) as reason why potential voters from the Vhembe region in Limpopo were not able to register to vote this past weekend for the upcoming local government elections. I’m thinking The Ghost and the Darkness and humming the chorus to Bon Jovi – Wild In The Streets.
-
News Just In: Trevor Manuel Is Apparently A Gangster
07 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
As if gangsterism in the Western Cape wasn’t bad enough, I was as shocked as anyone to find out that Planning Minister, and former Minister of Finance, Trevor Manuel is a hardened gangster whose open letter accusing Jimmy Manyi of being a racist, may have unleashed the full wrath of Jacob Zuma’s best friend.
-
The Burqa Ban Deadline Is Fast Approaching
07 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
The French are preparing to sail themselves into unchartered waters when the ban on wearing the Muslim burqa and other Islamic face coverings in public places comes into effect in just over a month. Racial tensions in that country have already begun to boil with the John Galliano “I love Hitler” incident. This will be interesting.
-
Julius Malema And Friends Want 60% Of Anglo-American
07 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 4 Comments
ANC Youth League President and man of letters, Julius Malema, says that his organisation would like some shares in mining company Anglo American, 60% to be precise. The predicated price of what would be a record take-over, the ANCYL predict, would be about R0.00.
-
Beijing Is Tracking All Mobile Phone User’s Movements
04 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
They can do that now. By ‘they’ I mean ‘those with money and de facto power,’ obviously, not specifically the heads of the PRC – but I mean government scrutiny of human movement is being implemented on a huge, huge scale. It’s called the Information Platform of Real-time Citizen Movement – which sounds like a good and reasonable platform.
-
The “Manyi” Bill, Let’s Crunch Those Numbers
03 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
Oh, you didn’t know that cabinet has already approved this little racial nugget? Well, basically it’s just waiting for a few more signatures now before it forces change upon us. According to the SA Institute of Race Relations, who kindly did crunch the numbers for everyone, a lot of job loss and not much job creation is in order.
-
This Week In Racism (A Summary)
03 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Racist fisticuffs are breaking out everywhere like the pimples on a young man’s greasy teenage skin. If it wasn’t enough when Kuli had a go at the coloureds, now the big guns have greased up their bodies with baby oil and are basically free wrestling with each other in the media.
-
Jimmy Manyi: No One But The BMF And ANCYL Are Behind Him On This One
03 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
If you haven’t heard yet, government spokesman, Jimmy Manyi said recently that he thinks that there is an oversupply of coloured folk in the Western Cape, and that perhaps it is best if they’d shift around a bit. He made the remarks on kykNET last year when he said: “So this over-concentration of coloureds in the Western Cape is not working for them.”
-
Iran Says London Logo Is Racist, Needs Redesign
02 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 3 Comments
Well here’s some sport’s news from those kooky guys in fun-lovin’ Iran. The world’s craziest government has now decided that the 2012 London Olympic Games logo is racist.
-
Anonymous’ Hack Scandal Forces Head of HBGary’s Resignation
02 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Anonymous, the online sort-of-anarchic sort-of-activist group, forced Aaron Barr, head of HBGary Federal, the massive American tech security company, to resign. Which is sort of a huge deal in the way that Charlie Sheen isn’t. Even though I love everything that Charlie Sheen touches.
-
Clifton Dictator Orders $380 Million Yacht
01 Mar 2011 by Seth Rotherham / 3 Comments
Teodorin Obiang, the 41-year-old son of Equatorial Guinea’s dictator, who has in the past done business in Clifton with local real estate agent, Denise Dogon, has commissioned the building of a luxury superyacht for himself worth $380 million – three times more than his country spends annually on health and education. The suspicion is that […]
-
Julian Assange Applies ™ To His Name
01 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / No Comments
Wikileaks founder Julian Assange, is attempting to trademark his name for use in “public speaking services” and “entertainment services.” Personally I’d exercise a little more energy on the whole ‘I’m being extradited to Sweden for charges of rape and sexual assault,’ thing, but maybe this is more important.
-
Zuma Rescued From Flirtatious Woman
01 Mar 2011 by Jasmine Stone / 1 Comment
Our commander-in-chief had to be rescued by his bodyguards when an unidentified woman got a little too frisky with him at a gala event in Sun City. The party, which was celebrated on the eve of the ANC’s election manifesto, has left our leader with the daunting task of explaining the incident to not one wife, but three. And you thought being president was easy.
-
-
-
2oceansvibe Partners
-
-
