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Movie Reviews
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STRINGCAESAR – LOCALLY PRODUCED MOVIE SHOT INSIDE POLLSMOOR PRISON
21 Jun 2010 by Seth Rotherham / No Comments
A buddy of mine, Warren Adler, is starring in a locally made film called StringCaesar. The movie was filmed inside Pollsmoor, South Africa’s most notorious prison, as it becomes a microcosm of the world of Julius Ceasar’s adolescence, where gangs, deals, allegiances, sexual liaisons, fear, anger, tears, laughter and fleeting happines were the order of […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: The Box (2009)
16 Jun 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
The Box stars Cameron Diaz and while The Botox would have been a more provocative title, the curiosity of discovering what’s inside the box has been a “priceless” fascination for man, cat and baby since the beginning of time. Writer-director, Richard Kelly has only made one film since the acclaimed Donnie Darko. Unfortunately, Southland Tales […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus (2009)
09 Jun 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
Great actors don’t just impersonate, they embody personalities for a living and you’ve got to wonder how much of their soul dies with each new character they bring to life? When that soul passes… is there a red carpet leading into the fiery depths of Hell, an angel starter pack (halo, harp and wings) waiting […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Legion (2010)
02 Jun 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
Okay, so I’ve heard about Angels with Dirty Faces and Angels in the Outfield. I never thought I’d live to see the day angels started toting Thor’s hammer and The Punisher’s weapon of choice… until I saw Legion. When God realises that humanity isn’t getting any better he decides to scour mankind from the face […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Green Zone (2010)
26 May 2010 by SPLING / 1 Comment
Green Zone is just another better-than-average Iraq war film in the company of Body of Lies, Traitor and The Kingdom. We’ve seen the covert missions, the terrorist agendas and the corrupt officials before and it’s getting a little old now… The film’s main selling point is that it comes straight from the tag team that […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Hot Tub Time Machine (2010)
19 May 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
Ahhh… 1986, Reagan was still President, Maradona scored the “Goal of the Century” in the FIFA World Cup in Mexico, Chernobyl was still doing plant tours, Mike Tyson won his first world boxing title, Lady Gaga said “ga-ga” for the first time, Voyager 2 had its first encounter with Uranus and Michael J. Fox manned […]
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HEY LOOK! IT’S THAT GUY!
17 May 2010 by Seth Rotherham / No Comments
You know when you’re watching a movie and you see this guy? Bob Gunton is “That Guy” (awesome fist action, by the way) That’s when my ex-digs mate, Mark Pfuhl (The Fabrics Guy), would say to me, “Hey Seth, there’s that guy again!” And then I would say to Mark, “Yes Mark, his name is […]
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SPL!NG Robin Hood Movie Review (2010)
12 May 2010 by SPLING / 1 Comment
Apparently, any film starring Russell Crowe and directed by Ridley Scott can’t go wrong. Having collaborated on Gladiator, A Good Year, American Gangster and Body of Lies, it’s safe to say they’ve got a winning formula. The film rides on the back of almost a century of Robin Hoods ranging from Robin Hood (1912) to […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Edge of Darkness (2010)
05 May 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
It’s been a good 8 years since Mel Gibson had to have that chat with the top half of his wife in Signs. Since then he’s been spotted in Papparazzi, The Singing Detective and a TV series called Complete Savages. Speaking of savages, he’s also directed two blood-thirsty yet critically-acclaimed films in The Passion of […]
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SPL!NG Movie Preview: Iron Man 2 (2010)
28 Apr 2010 by SPLING / 4 Comments
Iron Man 2 opens this Friday with sneak previews tomorrow night and you’ve got no idea what to expect. Well, for starters – Iron Man’s in it. The title may have given it away, but you’ll be happy to know he’s back with “the man” (aka Robert Downey Jr.) in fighting form as the Tony […]
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HITLER IS PISSED OFF ABOUT “FAIR USE”
23 Apr 2010 by Seth Rotherham / 1 Comment
The other morning in the Morning Spice Headlines, we mentioned the following: Hitler “Downfall” Parodies Removed from YouTube – The movie studio responsible for the award-winning, German-Austrian film Downfall (German: Der Untergang) has asked YouTube to take down several videos from the massively popular subtitled “Hitler finds out…” meme, and the site has complied. Oh […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Kick-Ass (2010)
21 Apr 2010 by SPLING / 8 Comments
The Kick-Ass comic book to film adaptation was inevitable. Come on, if Catwoman gets one, surely everyone’s entitled to slap on some spandex and snarl? While you daydream about Halle Berry in a cat suit, you should know that her follow-up to that Oscar-whining “performance” in Monster’s Balls is the equivalent of kitty litter and […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Clash of the Titans (2010)
14 Apr 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
Believe it or not, Clash of the Titans is a remake and not a spoof of… no – not Remember the Titans, that was American football… rewind a bit further back to 1981’s Clash of the Titans starring People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive in 1987, Harry Hamlin. You haven’t watched it? Neither have I, although […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Outrageous! (2010)
07 Apr 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
Outrageous! boasts a who’s who heavyweight comedy team of stand-ups including: John Vlismas, Barry Hilton, Joey Rasdien, Krijay Govender, Loyiso Gola, Mark Banks and Riaad Moosa. Imagine the scene from Tombstone as the sharp-shooters wander into town, ready to do the Riverdance, armed with guns and handlebar moustaches… they mean business! Now the cast from […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: The Bounty Hunter (2010)
31 Mar 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
‘Scuse my French, but quite frankly The Bounty Hunter is a polished turd. This is the kind of movie you’d expect Mel Gibson to star in about 20 years ago… oh wait it was, and he did in Bird on a Wire co-starring alongside his butt and Kate Hudson’s mom, Goldie Hawn. Now before you […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: The Hurt Locker (2009)
24 Mar 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
This year, the big Oscar show down was like a divorce settlement between James Cameron (Avatar) and ex-wife, Kathryn Bigelow (The Hurt Locker). Needless to say, The Hurt Locker pulled Best Picture (the house), with Bigelow (no relation to Deuce) making history as the first female recipient of Best Director (the car), leaving Cameron in […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: (500) Days of Summer (2009)
17 Mar 2010 by SPLING / 4 Comments
(500) Days of Summer is not about surfing… and no surfers were harmed in the making of this film. The Endless Summer was a quest for the perfect wave, while (500) Days of Summer is the quest for the perfect girl. That is unless you equate the game of love with the ocean, in which […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Shutter Island (2010)
10 Mar 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
I love a good mystery/thriller… that’s why I just had to catch Shutter Island, a new Scorsese film starring Leonardo DiCaprio and based on the novel of the same title by crime/mystery writer, Dennis Lehane (Gone Baby Gone, Mystic River). DiCaprio and Scorsese are quickly becoming a Hollywood staple as Shutter Island marks the fourth […]
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R100 ON “DISTRICT 9” WILL GET YOU R10,000!
04 Mar 2010 by Seth Rotherham / No Comments
That’s pretty radical! Hey? And I wouldn’t rule it out if I were you. Remember 2006 when outsider Crash surprised the world and beat Brokeback Mountain to win Best Film? Ja, exactly! I must say, I had no idea that Great Odds also covered thing like The Oscars. Did you know that? Seriously, I thought […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Alice in Wonderland 3D (2010)
03 Mar 2010 by SPLING / 2 Comments
Lewis Carroll wrote what some conspiracy theorists believe was a tale about the effects of hallucinogenic drugs. Perhaps the whole who ha started with Go Ask Alice about a teenage girl’s spiral into drugs in the ’60s, coupled with a song called White Rabbit and William Shatner. Whatever… Disney adapted it and they do Alice […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: The Book of Eli (2010)
24 Feb 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
I know I’m stating the obvious here, but Denzel Washington is not Mr. T. They act, dress and talk differently… Mr. T carries that Mad Max era cool like someone before their time and while he’s been off the Hollywood scene beating Cancer and endorsing cooking gadgets in an apron, this could have been his […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Crazy Heart (2009)
17 Feb 2010 by SPLING / 1 Comment
I’m a big fan of ‘The Dude’… you know, Jeff Bridges in The Big Lebowski. What, you haven’t seen it?! It’s a cornerstone of modern cinema, one of the top scoring f-bombers with ‘cult classic’ written all over it – available at all old school video stores! Anyways… ‘The Dude’ is now more like ‘The […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: The Wolfman (2010)
10 Feb 2010 by SPLING / 2 Comments
If you’ve ever gone camping without a razor, you’ll know exactly how scary you start to look after a few days without shaving. From 5 ‘o clock shadow it’s only a few hours before midnight and if you add a full moon to the picture… your friends will start wishing they’d bought the more expensive […]
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SPL!NG Movie Preview: The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus (2009)
03 Feb 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
A traveling carnival sideshow “family” and their supernatural mirror gateway to one’s own imagination is put in jeopardy after they rescue a wanted criminal and go head-to-head in a soul-grabbing game with the Devil incarnate. The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus… intriguing ‘yes’, based on a true story ‘no’! In fact, what Terry Gilliam film isn’t […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Up in the Air (2009)
27 Jan 2010 by SPLING / 3 Comments
Have you ever been fired or had to fire someone? Unless you’re Donald “You’re Fired!” Trump it’s never nice. In fact, the only time it’s considered to have gone well by American standards is if no one died. We think we’re defined by our jobs. These days, it’s the first bland thing anyone ever asks […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Expired (2007)
20 Jan 2010 by SPLING / No Comments
Unlike most city parking meters, Expired hasn’t… The film is about parking enforcement officers (to some “boetabessies”)… you know, the people that stick pretty pink tickets on your windscreen. It may look all sweet and innocent like Jodie Foster in Taxi Driver, but don’t be fooled… it’s an indie film in the league of Punch […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Tyson (2009)
13 Jan 2010 by SPLING / 2 Comments
With such memorable quotes as “I’m gonna f**k you till you love me”, I can’t think of anyone in their right minds who’d want to trade places with Mike Tyson. The man has carved a little piece of Hell for himself over the last four decades… from his childhood days of petty crime in Brownsville […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: A Perfect Getaway (2009)
06 Jan 2010 by SPLING / 3 Comments
I watch pretty much anything with Milla Jovovich (there I said it!) and I had high hopes for A Perfect Getaway. After first watching her as Lilli in Return to Blue Lagoon, she went on to star in cult trip, Dazed and Confused and then The Fifth Element as Leeloo – I was hooked – […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Waltz with Bashir (2008)
30 Dec 2009 by SPLING / No Comments
Waltz with Bashir is extraordinary in terms of its originality and representation of war… An animated biographical war documentary drama takes an Israeli director on a journey to reconstruct and clarify the events of the 1982 invasion of Lebanon from the accounts of fellow veterans. And no, it’s nothing like Team America: World Police. The […]
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SPL!NG Movie Review: Sherlock Holmes (2009)
23 Dec 2009 by SPLING / No Comments
What comes to mind when you hear the name Sherlock Holmes? The character has been around since the late 1800s when Sir Arthur Conan-Doyle conjured up a gentleman, who could draw big conclusions from small details. A London-based detective, whose sharp intellect and keen eye could keep him in-the-know, without having to rely on any […]
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