Word is afoot that a film version of my all time favourite childhood comic, The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is in the works, with the writers of the Iron Man franchise on the case. Although, whether this film will work for the generation that actually cared about the comic remains to be seen. After all, […]

Continue Reading

The Guardian reports that an Italian soccer show, Quelli Che il Calcio (of course), has been used as a communications hub by the Mafia to communicate with the Men of Respect doing hard time in the chookie. You know those shows where illiterate viewers text in with their cell phones, and the show scrolls the […]

Continue Reading

Exxon Mobil positions it’s brand at the vanguard of innovating clean energy for the world. It has a clean, 21st century look. The employees on it’s corporate advertising posters are friendly, sharply dressed, multi-ethnic. It produces print advertisements in National Geographic like this: And they like to chat quite a bit about water on their […]

Continue Reading

Feeling a little bit wonky… When their students aren’t quibbling over gay kissing, UCT and Stellenbosch University are waging beer war. And beer is most certainly worth waging war over. Consider these wise words of wisdom from greater men than I: “You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline […]

Continue Reading

The Sun (the vanguard of high-integrity journalism in the United Kingdom) reported this morning that residents of a council estate in West York are being terrorised by monstrously-sized rodents. One man, known only as “Brandon” was the hero of the moment, after he shot one of the beasts twice in the head, thereby smiting it […]

Continue Reading

Being a rapper is good for business. Or rather, “bidness, yo”. So much so that Forbes has compiled a list of the top ten highest-grossing rap artists of the last year, subtly titled “Hip Hop Cash Kings” And it goes somethin’ a little like THIS, fool.

Continue Reading

Online encyclopedia and paragon of humankind’s collective knowledge, WikiPedia, has proven it’s unbridled accuracy once again. Remember the story about WikiPedia referring to Sepp Blatter as a dickhead? And how the South African presidency made the fatal error of pulling that corrupted biographical info from WikiPedia and pasted it on their site? Well, we hope […]

Continue Reading

The greatest Canadian scourge since Brandon Huntley Celine Dion, Justin Bieber stirs grown men to panic. The vapid, androgynous, lesbo-chic music has taken the pubescent world by storm, and the boy girl with the pudding bowl kop chop seems to wield genuine power. As demonstrated by his latest foray into social networking, where he tweeted […]

Continue Reading

Those of you who are Stellenbosch University Alumni may perhaps remember the annual “Soen in die Laan” (“Kiss in the Lane”) event, at which scores of students clench lips in a moment of heady abandon. Such a lovely Casablanca vibe, hey? Yeah, it is. Except…

Continue Reading

Remember the JetBlue flight attendant who pulled off the greatest self-termination of employment ever recorded?

Continue Reading

Are you a business executive? Do you find yourself tempted to remain at work until the wee hours of the morning, churning out directional missives, illuminating memos and pep-rousing employee bulletins? You may be adding too much douche to your vocab. Not sure? Test yourself. Do you, or have you ever used one of these […]

Continue Reading

Ricky Gervais has announced via his blog that he’s working on an installment of The Office for China, in addition to the Israely, German, Canadian, and French and American versions already in existence. I’m not so sure an obscure, culturally-based sitcom will work in China, especially considering that their gold standard for comedy usually goes […]

Continue Reading

What do you get when you combine rape, ghetto smack talk, potentially gay men, and Auto Tunes? No, the answer is NOT “Kuilsriver”. That’s not amusing. Shame on you. The correct answer would be: “Greatest DIY Ghetto Anthem of All Time”, or alternatively, “Eat Your Heart Out, Die Antwoord”. Here’s a little illuminating background info […]

Continue Reading

I’m just going to put this out there. If your father has political ambitions of the presidential kind, don’t be short sighted and follow him into the vote-collecting game. Go into mine management. It can be very, very lucrative. Ask Duduzane Zuma. But be sure to make an appointment. He may be very busy cuddling […]

Continue Reading

If you pop over to the Maldives in the next few years (as one is prone to do), you might be inclined to hit an extended hang out at the airport in lieu of finding accommodation. Haptic Architects (London) and Narud Stokke Wiig Architects (Oslo) have teamed up to provide a design for the Maldives […]

Continue Reading

You may have read on this morning’s spice that Rupert Murdoch has laid claim to the “Sky” in “Skype”, right after Skype announced its plans to float on the Nasdaq stock exchange in New York. The world’s most deliciously-evil media magnate has justified his claim by arguing that NewsCorp derivative BSkyB was established before Skype, […]

Continue Reading

Especially when they can’t get their daily McFix. I love McDonalds for one reason, and one reason only – the name is brilliant for McPuns (right, enough of that). But millions of people the world over express a deep and burning desire to consume their preferred McDonalds product each and every day, as the need […]

Continue Reading

In this crazy, crazy world of hyper-consumption, brands are putting a lot of emphasis on consumer loyalty. And the best way to nail down consumer loyalty? Get to your consumer before anyone else does. We all know that the combination of Klipdrift brandy and Coke is quite a big deal north of the Vaal. If […]

Continue Reading

If the original Top Gear is sex, then Top Gear USA is sex with a dead person. Mechanically speaking, you’re doing the same thing, but it’s wrong, and you should never, ever do it, and society will hate you for it, and you’ll always be remembered as the guy who took something fundamentally awesome and […]

Continue Reading

Let me blow your mind: Nandos is in Canada. And no, Brandon Huntley didn’t franchise it. Shocking news, ey? I mean, Nandos must surely be as quintessentially South African as KFC, what with it’s Portuguese name, recipes and store decor. Nevertheless, the great chicken company in the sky is downright universal, making an appearance across […]

Continue Reading

If you’re in an executive position (as most of you LSM 12-14 vibers will be), then this is the kind of boss that you should aspire to be. Clearly, this man has been taking management lessons from one Seth Rotherham, esq. I mean, look at this company memo. Solid gold leadership, ey? There’s oh so […]

Continue Reading

I’m not sure if you’ve heard of the latest example of South African Police Service Force overkill. Journalist Mzilikazi wa Afrika was arrested for a yet-to-be-defined offense rather uncomfortably soon after the same journalist leveled serious corruption allegations against Police Brigadier General His Worship The Most Reverend Doctor His Honour Bheki Cele. Read on for […]

Continue Reading

Some of our parliamentary readers will be aware that yesterday the South African parliament was the scene of a death for the the first time since the the 1966 assassination of one Hendrik Verwoerd, esq. Louisa Phumela Zama, 27, was one of three people in a delegation representing a KwaZulu-Natal Reserve Force unit, the Durban […]

Continue Reading

So we wrote recently about Gordon Ramsay making an ever so slightly unceremonious exit from Cape Town, and specifically, the One & Only hotel. Needless to say, The Big Bad Potty Mouth and his cronies are slightly upset about this. I mean, it must leave a little bit of a sting to be tossed out […]

Continue Reading

A lot of people get quite angry with Keane, especially in England where they hate the fact that they went to private schools and the fact that lead singer Tom Chaplin’s cheeks are too rosy and he seems like a bit of a choir boy – despite upping his rock n’ roll credentials with a […]

Continue Reading

Many of us have been in this situation, mostly in our younger years of irresponsibility and fiscal-hedonism. Sometimes, usually around five days into the month, there would be a chilling knock on the door. Instantly, your heart shifts the primary location of its beating from your chest to your stomach. The landlord is at the […]

Continue Reading

“Marina Bay Sands” sounds like a fairly generic resort, right? It could be anywhere in the world. It’d be nice, but you know, when you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all. Wrong. Infinity pools are as cool as they sound. But a 150 meter long, gently curving arc of water perched on top of a […]

Continue Reading

The outrage! The utter outrage! This is an absolute abhoration. I am totally appalled. I don’t even have the words. This is the second initiation video to surface from South Africa’s most infamous university – the University of the Free State. You have to watch this.

Continue Reading

Everyone knows Iran needs a steady supply of uranium to develop it’s peaceful nuclear energy-production. But the west is being all iffy about monitoring the grade and quantity of uranium that the Iranians can get their hands on. Western governments have even gone so far as to implement sanctions against Iran. Those guys are total […]

Continue Reading

When Sol Kerzner enlisted the expertise of the man who is arguably the world’s most popular chef, Gordon Ramsay, he would have felt confident that the star food aspect of his monstrous V&A Waterfront hotel, the One and Only, was buttoned tight. Gordon Effin’ Ramsay opened the five star Maze restaurant at the hotel, but […]

Continue Reading