THE 148TH RUNNING OF THE QUEEN’S PLATE
I remember a girl friend of 2oceansvibe being ever so slightly scorned at the emotional neglect dealt to her by 2oceansvibe’s “The Kitesurfer.” We had ploughed through a bottle of bubbly at Karma the one night and time came for me to exit. A tad tipsy, she said unto me (with her fingers snapping in […]
TBG SIGHTINGS GAIN MOMENTUM
Janie S sent this in, excitedly reporting that The TBG (Tall Blonde Guy) was spotted at the Associated Magazines year end function. She didn’t waste the chance to document her moment with the great man. Pure awesomeness Janie, what more can we say – you’ve been blessed. Some people die, having only seen […]
DICKIPEDIA
2oceansvibe Character and professional red-head, “Six Figures,” sent this in – asking if I had seen it and admitting that he is not on the cutting edge. No, Six Figures, I had not seen it. You’ve done well…this time. It comes as a great relief, following your last email with subject “brilliant!” with a link […]
THE US CAR MANUFACTURER BAILOUT
Good. Pass.
ANTHONY TAKES BEGGING TO ANOTHER LEVEL
The Cartoonist gave a handsome tip to this intrepid Cape Town beggar and asked him for a photograph. We thought you would appreciate his ingenuity, with not the time nor need to have a sign made. Rather, he simply states the facts on his clothes and keeps his hands available. “VERY HUNGRY” Anthony gets […]
SHANE WARNE – THE MUSICAL
Normal people and cricket fans alike will be tickled by this little announcement – the fact that the Ozzie’s have put together a $2 million musical production about their most controversial sportsman ever, Shane Warne. Entitled Shane Warne – The Musical. Tickets are on sale now. Check it out. Shane Warne – The Musical […]
2OCEANSVIBE EXCLUSIVE – GUMTREE JOB OFFER FOR OFFICE SLUT
I couldn’t quite believe mine eyes as I read through this job offer and subsequent email exchange between a genuinely hopeful candidate and the potential employer. It is a rare treat for it to fall into place so effortlessly. We refer to these sets of circumstance as a “gift.” I would like to make it […]
KID ROCK LAUGHS IN THE FACE OF PETA
Kid Rock is possibly one of the last true rock stars left. Not only is he not helping orphans in Africa, but he is also refusing to stop wearing fur. So much so that he has told PETA to bring it on! Kid RockDoesn’t give a toss British Sunday Mail reports: “I […]
TEQUILA STILL WORKS
I was sent in this video by a reader who stumbled upon it on Facebook. Proof, once again, that too much tequila can hurt you. Although, luckily in this case, it was a soft landing. CLICK HERE if that don’t play Why did the Mexican throw his wife off a cliff? TEQUILA!
JERRY HALL TO PLAY COUGAR IN NEW LAGERFELD CHANEL CAMPAIGN
The Cut has confirmed that Karl Lagerfeld will be shooting a Chanel handbag campaign about the relationship between a young man and a woman almost twice his age. Karl has, quite sensibly I might add, cast Jerry Hall as the cougar! JE-RRY! JE-RRY! JE-RRY! The Cut reveals: Karl Lagerfeld will shoot a […]
PAMELA ANDERSON HAS LOOKED BETTER
P. Anderson Ja, look, that’s not what we signed up for.
CHRISTOPHER WALKEN ATTENDS CAPE TOWN TENS LAUNCH
I attended the much anticipated Cape Town 10’s launch at The Grand, in Camps Bay on Thursday evening last week. It was everything I had dreamed of, and more. Especially when I saw Roxy Louw arrive with Hollywood superstar, Christopher Walken. “I got this watch..” Ok, it wasn’t Christopher Walken, it was actually ex-Springbok, Rob […]
FERRARI PRETENDS TO BE THE MAYOR
We were chatting the other day (see article here) about the different car numberplates on the road and the peculiar concept of people pretending to own exclusive CA numberplates, by faking it on a personalised WP registration – thus destroying the whole point of the exercise. Someone wrote to me after that story and explained […]
WINDHOEK BEER USES OSCAR WINNER IN NEW TV AD
I’ve seen a couple local “blogs” chatting about this new Windhoek ad, featuring Oscar winner, Louis Gossett Junior. Now, whilst that news is somewhat exciting, I think we should be telling it the way he (Louis) is telling it to his mates… The fact that he did the ad with 2oceansvibe’s G-Man. That’s correct – […]
MEGAMILLIONS LOTTERY SITTING AT R1.7 BILLION
Are you aware of this? It’s a lot of money. One point seven billion Rand. It rolls so nicely off the tongue. Not AS well as when you tell your boss to get stuffed when you win it. CLICK HERE to buy MEGA MILLIONS tickets safely and securely online. There is nothing more I can […]
A BABY PUFFIN IS CALLED A PUFFLING
Deal with it.
GOODBYE MONDAY
Taken from The Safe House Hazy – nice vibe
NOTHING OVERLY RADICAL
A little hazy today, actually. 25 degrees, but with this haze vibe going for it. Very nice, mind you – takes the edge off, if you know what I mean. We checked it out after a light lunch at Cappers . G-Man and I went for the calamari, whilst The Dude went for the Club […]
CYCLIST WEARS HELMET INDOORS AT CAPRICE
Grant M, sent this pic in. Taken at Caprice on Saturday, citing the incident as “very emboerrissing.” Very toilet behaviour It’s not just emboerrissing, Grant, it’s downright rude. It is anti-social, ignorant behaviour by a handful of people who, as children, were never taught any manners. I would have got the wooden spoon […]
HOLLY MADISON HAS COME A LONG WAY
You might know her as Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner’s ex-Number 1 girlfriend. Holly Madison But to me and her close family and friends, she’ll always be Holly Cullen, the brunette from Oregan who worked at Hooters. That was around the time she (according to this website I found) indulged in a spot of rhinoplasty […]
COMING TO AMERICA – SHE IS YOUR QUEEN TO BE
Sorry to butt-in on your otherwise very serious vibe, but it is very important that you watch this urgently. I stumbled upon Eddie Murphy’s Coming To America on satellite this week and was reminded of the various genius highlights that I had forgotten. Obviously there are the basics, like “your royal penis is clean your […]
JOKERS LAUNCH SPRINGBOK EMBLEM ONLINE GAME
A few weeks ago we featured the mock Parks-Board Bokkie signs that some very funny individuals had professionally made and placed around Cape Town. Needless to say, they saw the mention on 2oceansvibe and emailed me today to tell me about their latest over-the-top statement. This time it’s an online game which let’s you control […]
SCARLETT GOES FOR STRAWBERRY
Lip my stocking Not for, like, EVER. But for now, for a little bit, it’s fine.
AMY WINHOUSE HUSBAND GOES BACK TO JAIL
I watch a lot of movies and that is why I’ve made a saying for when things, like this, keep on recurring. I call it “a rerun of an old movie.” Use it, don’t use it. They should get computers with set timers that churn out stories, programmed with past recurring events and themes. I’m […]
JOE BONES HAS A KID
Our Florida (US) affiliate, rivercityvibe.com, has just had a kid. Or, rather, the editor has had a kid (without ovaries, websites will always struggle). In the words of rivercityvibes’s JOE BONES: Last night, Joe Bones became a father. He has undertaken to devote his entire life toward proving that a rock and roll lifestyle […]
BONO WILL NEVER DIE
I honestly don’t have the time to think of a good headline. I just wanted to show you this beautiful little story I got from Popbitch (subscribe to their newsletter – that’s where the action is): >> Bono of the week: pt 2 << Everyone in Dublin has a story JL writes: […]
ANNE HATHAWAY EXPECTING BABY
Let’s be honest, when you see the headline “Anne Expecting Bundle of Joy,” who do you think of? It doesn’t LEAP into your mind, does it? It’s not like Madonna, or Angelina, or Victoria, or Paris, or Lindsay, or Britney, or Kate. Personally, I IMMEDIATELY thought of Anne Hathaway . I was like, “Jesus, baking! […]
THE RETURN OF THE TBG
You don’t want to get excited about something as big as this until you have actual proof, in your hands. Or, on your hard drive. It is common knowledge that the TBG (Tall Blonde Guy) has been out of town on a three month hiatus (been DYING to use the word “haitus” for a while […]
NEGLECTED ROLLS-ROYCE PHANTOM
This reminds me of the cars in LA that park on the street. Sent in by Fergus, after a recent trip to Lagos. Note front right flat tyre.. Bad owner. Naughty owner. Owner probably doesn’t even know! We should steal it.
ANDY FORDHAM RETURNS TO THE DARTS CIRCUIT
I said his name in the headline as though you should know who he is. Don’t fret, neither do I. But I DID think you would enjoy the story you’re about to read and, in particular his photo and forearms. My goodness! This is also, I’m sure, quite a treat for the ex-pats over in […]
