I think it’s a given that I am not often caught within the clothing section of Woolies. Well that all changed the other day when I took the secret Woolworths goods lift into the V&A Waterfront to get directly to the shop that I intended visiting in the centre. It’s what I do from time to time when my brain is in “conceptualising mode” so as not to deal with civilians.

It is pertinent to note that I had this image of Paris Hilton in my mind as I walked through the lingerie section of Woolworths. That was when I passed by the Woolies lingerie line called JT1. I don’t know what the fuck it stands for but I urge all the angel readers out there to get to Woolies URGENTLY and get deep inside this range before it goes. The Muse has informed me that it is available at V&A, Cavendish and Canal Walk.

Good Lord almighty! It’s pink mania! Just what we’re looking for!

I’ll be honest, I nearly jumped the mannequin..

 

She was giving me that look.

 

She was trying to act cool.

But I knew what she was looking for.

 

Yes! Let’s ROLL with that!

 

Sorry, were you talking to me?

 

Go tomorrow. They’re open tomorrow. It’s Saturday. Buy some lingerie. For me. For your boyfriend. For your husband. For YOU!

Just do it.

Please.

For God’s sake, woman!