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I hope we’ve all been enjoying the break in news coverage for everything Royal Family related.

The UK’s gossip rags still offer 24/7 hot takes on the latest atrocities committed by Harry and Meghan, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, if that’s your thing.

For the rest of us, there’s been a welcome respite since Queen Elizabeth II was laid to rest. Long live the King, or something like that.

We’re back on the royal beat briefly to report on Harry and Meghan being “demoted” on the Royal Family’s website “to bottom billing alongside the Duke of York”.

It’s never a good sign when you’re popped alongside the man often referred to as “a sweaty nonce”, reports The Telegraph:

Until recently, the couple featured midway down the rankings, below senior members of the family but ahead of minor royals such as the Duke and Duchess of Gloucester, the Duke of Kent, Princess Alexandra and Prince and Princess Michael of Kent.

When the webpage was updated to reflect the order of succession following Queen Elizabeth’s death, the Sussexes and Prince Andrew were repositioned at the bottom of the page.

King Charles III is said to be looking at a slimmed-down monarchy.

I’m not sure how much of a damn the Sussexes will give. Prince Andrew, on the other hand, must prepare to be frozen out against his wishes.

Let’s engage in some trash tabloid action with The Mirror:

Andrew could be reduced to nothing more than the royal dog walker-in-chief under Charles’ rule, it has been alleged.

Royal expert Nigel Cawthorne understands that the Prince could end up receiving just a token allowance from the new King.

“I can’t see he’s got much of a role [in the Royals] aside from Lord High Dogwalker, keeper of the royal corgis… “Who would want him? What supermarket or school wants Andrew cutting the ribbon?

“Andrew could end up embarrassing them even more – so instead [Charles] would have to give him some ‘hush money’.”

Most Britons accused of repeatedly raping underage girls don’t have their family’s hush money to rely on to make the problem go away.

In addition, most Britons can’t force news websites to delete embarrassing video clips. The Royal Family has had at least five short clips from the Queen’s memorial and funeral services at Westminster Abbey and Windsor Castle purged from UK media websites.

That includes one of Charles’ pen meltdowns.

Back to the Sussexes, who were also demoted on the Royal website billing 15 months ago. On that occasion, they dropped from a position directly below Prince William and Kate (then the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge) to below the Wessexes and Princess Anne.

Oh, the inhumanity:

The Sussexes are thought to have returned home on the day after the Queen’s funeral feeling more ostracised than ever, their new status in the general hierarchy having been made abundantly clear.

Barely on speaking terms with several of their closest relatives, the lack of communication between Buckingham Palace and their own office could be blamed for various dramas from a mistaken invitation to a state reception to confusion over military uniforms, not to mention differing versions of exactly when Prince Harry learnt of his grandmother’s death.

One point of contention that remains unanswered, and that the Sussexes may actually care about, relates to the titles their children are able to use.

We are yet to find out whether three-year-old Archie and one-year-old Lilibet will be allowed to use their new titles of prince and princess.

Because they are grandchildren of the sovereign, they would usually automatically be given those titles upon the Queen’s death:

Yet although the new titles of the Prince and Princess of Wales have been updated on the royal website, Archie and Lilibet’s have not, despite other changes being made.

It’s all so petty.

Who actually enjoys this sort of nonsense from an institution that has racked up millions (if not billions) in assets while the average UK resident struggles to keep the lights on?

The year is 2022. Tell them to get real jobs like everybody else.

[sources:telegraph&mirror]