[imagesource: YouTube / NYC Emergency Management]

Remain calm.

I don’t want to alarm you unnecessarily. There has been a nuclear attack, though, and I’m going to talk you through what to do next while standing in front of a white van.

I really don’t understand why they chose that vehicle to appear in the background. Everybody knows white vans cause panic.

Yesterday, New York City’s Emergency Management Department released a 90-second public service announcement with empty city streets and sirens going off in the background.

Nobody is pointing fingers (“Don’t ask me how or why”) even though we can hazard a guess it’s probably a certain Russian president they’re most worried about.

There are three main points they want residents to take on board:

Always good to be prepared, I suppose.

When reached for comment, a spokesperson for the department said that “while the likelihood of a nuclear weapon incident occurring in/near New York City is very low, it is important New Yorkers know the steps to stay safe.”

Residents outside of the immediate blast zone, pay attention. As for the rest – it’s bad news via VICE:

Anyone within the initial blast radius of the detonation will be consumed by nuclear fire. How big is that blast radius? It’s wildly variable. If Russia’s SS-25 missile (it’s largest known nuclear warhead) detonated over Midtown Manhattan, everything from W. 30th to W. 52nd street and between 10th and 3rd Avenue would be gone. Vaporized. The resultant blast wave would smash into buildings as far away as Bloomfield, New Jersey, and the edge of JFK Airport.

A tactical, so-called low-yield nuclear weapon like some in Congress think the Pentagon needs, would have a decreased area of effect but would still kill millions.

If somebody were to use a B61 nuclear bomb (unlikely because that’s America’s design), six or so blocks would be instantly wrecked and the blast wave would only barely touch New Jersey.

The death toll would still be immense.

Let’s just hope it never comes to this.

[source:vice]