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White-collar criminals like former Full House star Lori Laughlin aren’t willing to take any chances ahead of potential prison stays, which is why they often hire a prison consultant to guide them through.

Yes, that is a real thing, with the consultant guiding their clients through prison etiquette, and how to run your affairs on the outside while you’re on the inside.

Prison etiquette includes basics like who gets the bottom bed in the cell, and how to notice a ‘shiv’ before you’re stabbed with it.

Rumour has it that attacking the scariest prisoner on your first day is outdated, but I think Harvey Weinstein, who is facing up to 25 years in jail after being found guilty of third-degree rape and a first-degree criminal sexual act, should give it a bash.

Given that he’s hired a prison consultant, or ‘prison prepper’ as they’re also known, Weinstein should be clued up, but his crimes are going to make his life tougher than someone like Laughlin.

The Telegraph reports:

For thousands of dollars, experts say, the unnamed consultant will most likely explain to Weinstein how to survive life in the slammer as an ultra-recognisable sex offender, going into everything from how to deal with his fellow inmates to how to fill his long, empty days.

…when he leaves the hospital prison ward to which he was rushed after suffering heart palpitations following his conviction, the 67-year-old will be held at Rikers Island, a notorious New York jail which housed Tupac, Sid Vicious and Mark Chapman, the man who killed John Lennon. Rikers has been plagued by overcrowding, gang brutality and allegations of human rights violations, and conditions are so brutal that in 2017 mayor Bill de Blasio vowed to shut it down within a decade.

Steve Dagworthy is one such consultant, having founded Prison Consultants, the UK’s first jail time advice service, back in 2012.

He talks about how the first six months are “dominated by fear and bewilderment” until the prisoner reaches “realisation point”, which can soon be followed by depression.

Dagworthy talks about trying to keep your head down and avoid attention (tough when you’re Weinstein), and that is backed up by David Parker (not his real name), another prison consultant:

In order to survive – and even thrive – he says Weinstein will need to show respect to his fellow inmates. The old adage that you should “find the biggest guy you can and punch him” – as demonstrated by Edward Norton’s character in American History X (1998), who gets into a brawl to prepare for his spell inside – is “horrible advice”, Parker says. Your relationship with fellow inmates is far more important than your relationship with guards, whom you should keep at arm’s length in case you are seen to be currying favour…

It is likely that Weinstein will be placed in protective custody, Parker thinks, to stop him meeting the same fate as James ‘Whitey’ Bulger, the organised crime boss who was beaten to death in his West Virginia cell in October 2018.

If used wisely, Weinstein’s money could come in handy with regards bribes to fellow inmates or guards, but some prison gangs could use displays of wealth to extort and threaten the prisoner or their family.

As mentioned previously, Rikers Island has a torrid reputation, with a second Telegraph article calling it a “brutal jail” that has earned the nickname of  ‘Torture Island’.

Situated in the East River between Queens and the Bronx, the 400-acre complex can hold up to 10 000 inmates, making it the second-largest jail complex in the US.

It also goes by ‘Gladiator School’ and ‘the Guantanamo of New York’, so it’s no surprise that Weinstein is more at home in a prison ward at Bellevue Hospital due to chest pains.

That won’t last forever, and he will have to head to the real slammer at some stage:

Weinstein will spend his days – under the identity of prison number 06581138Z – confined in a bleak wing of the jail known as the North Infirmary Command; two buildings that are used to house sick inmates, and those famous enough to require protection from their neighbours.

He may receive some protection, but he will still have to deal with many of the harsh realities of prison life.

It has regularly made headlines throughout its history, particularly for its brutal treatment of prisoners. Some of the techniques alleged to be used include the excessive use of force, strip searches, solitary confinement, excessively long detainment times, and even the use of physical restraints to “hog-tie” prisoners’ limbs together.

The lingering threat of a “spell in the box” – or solitary confinement – hangs over all the inmates…

“The smell alone would torture you,” said Candie Hailey-Means, a former inmate who was incarcerated at Rikers Island until May 2015, and described it as “sewer, mixed with fertilizer, mixed with death.”

There is a chance that Weinstein could be sleeping in bunk rooms at the infirmary with up to 40 patients.

To read about more of the horrors of Rikers Island, head here.

You’ve made your prison bed, Harvey, and now it’s time to lie in it.

[sources:telegraph&telegraph]