As we surge towards the end of the year, everyone is looking forward to some well-earned rest and relaxation.

I guess that’s not everyone’s cup of tea, though, so maybe Sex Island is more up your alley.

Unlimited sex, free food and dops, and a liberal amount of cocaine – welcome to your four day, three-night stay on a Colombian private island.

We will start with the promo video, because that will just about set the scene. Parts of this video are just about NSFW:

Nah, I’m good.

Head over to their website, sexisland.co, and you’ll find a handy countdown:

Apparently there are only 30 tickets for sale, and each will set you back a cool $5 000 (R69 000, funnily enough).

More info from that site:

60 Girls – Each guest receives one ticket, which includes the company of 2 girls each day for unlimited amounts of sex. There will be 60 girls to choose from. At any moment you can switch girls with the other 30 guests.

Luxury Yacht & Incredible Sexual Surprises – Each day we will have incredible surprise sexual events, including partying on our luxury yacht, live sex shows, etc!

Drug Friendly – Our event allows for all types of drug consumption and our girls are drug friendly.

Airport Pick Up & Drop Off – We will pick up you up directly at the airport in Private Location on NOV 24th and drop off NOV 27th at the same airport. We will deliver the new location only to the clients that pays. (please notify us what time you will be arrive and departing)

Airport transfers, why didn’t you say so? Just in case that was somehow a mitigating factor in whether or not you would head to an island that offers you the chance to trade women with other guests like they were baseball cards or something.

The package also offers “Bedroom equipped with shower, closet, air conditioning, and Wi-Fi, Volleyball court and jet skis, Beautiful beaches”.

Do you feel sexually inadequate? Don’t worry, they’ll take care of that too:

All the girls serve to please and make you feel like a king. If you have any special desires or fantasies, inform the host or the girls and they will make sure to fulfill [sic] them. All our girls are tested and free of any sexual diseases. There is a strict condom usage policy, and we have an unlimited amount of condoms.

I dunno, I get the feeling this could be another one of those Fyre Fest disasters.

Know of anyone suffering from a severe mid-life crisis with cash to burn? Send them this link and then tell them to do better.

[source:independent]