There are thousands of things that make us a pretty odd bunch down this side of the world, and it seems South Africans are keen to celebrate some of our weirder habits.

Last week a Capetonian called Wayne Nefdt wrote a list called “HOW TO TELL IF YOU’RE SOUTH AFRICAN” that he posted on Facebook (HERE) with that image above, and since then it has really taken off.

At the time of writing, here’s what we are looking at:

Over 7 000 shares – not too shabby.

The post is a lengthy one, so we’re just going to pull out some of the observations that made us chuckle:

You call a friend “China” but until the Chinese stop snorting our Rhino horn & vreeting our Perlemoen they will never be our “China’s”

“Boet” & “Broer” both mean ‘Brother’ and work well especially when combined with “bliksem”. It’s vitally important to understand when to use Boet, when to use Broer & where to place your ‘bliksem’! When you hear ‘bliksem my Broer it’s been a long time’ – this is good, it means ‘you’re a dear friend that has been sorely missed’ but when you hear ‘my Boet ek gaan jou bliksem’ – this is not good, it means ‘you’re no friend of mine, I won’t miss & you’re going to be sore.’

Employees dance and sing in front of the building – to show how unhappy they are.

The SABC advertises and shows highlights of the programme you just finished watching…

You know what Rooibos Tea is & it pisses you off that other countries are selling it as if they invented it (even though you’ve never ever had any yourself).

When somebody gets “too technical” (a South African past-time of picking a claim or statement to pieces) you tell them not to “split ball hairs”

You can sing your national anthem with gusto in four languages and you have no idea what it means in any of them.

You know someone, who knows someone, who has met Nelson Mandela…

When you say something is “‘n bietjie lig in die broek” you aren’t saying ‘there’s a little light in his pants’ you’re saying there’s ‘no substance in it’ – think of Twiggy trying on Kim Kardashian’s trousers!

People have the most wonderful names: Christmas, Goodwill, Pretty, Wednesday, Blessing, Brilliant, Gift, Precious, Innocence and Given, Patience, Portion, Coronation, Beauty.

“Now now” or “just now” can mean anything from a minute to a month.

When you hand over your income tax cheque to Innocence at SARS you seriously consider suggesting that they just place 2 drop boxes on the counter – one labeled ‘Zuma’ & the other ‘Gupta’s’

You continue to wait after a traffic light (robot) has turned to green to make way for taxis travelling in the opposite direction who are allowed to go through ‘early red’

When you phone a Government department you know beforehand that you are going to be repeating your story at least 5 times as reception patches your call to ‘Hope’ who transfers your call to ‘Faith’, who puts you through to ‘Patience’, who says you need to call back Wednesday & you hang on for a further 10 mins before it dawns on you that she meant the day not the person.

Travelling at 120 km/h, you’re the slowest vehicle in the suburbs.

When you venture onto the highways, you use the left lane & still doing 120km/h you cruise by everyone else as they hog the ‘fast’ right lanes.

A bullet train is being introduced, but potholes can’t be fixed or depending on Govt source, it’s being introduced because the roads are full of potholes.

You have to prove that you don’t need a loan to get one…

You actually get these jokes and begin to think of other Saffers to share them with.

VIVA SA!!!!!

Viva SA indeed.

You can read the full post HERE.

[source:facebook]