[imagesource:picryl]

If you’re a techno fan or enjoy the soothing sounds of Adele, the Russian Republic of Chechnya is not the place to be a music lover.

The region’s Culture Minister, Musa Dadaev, instituted limits on musical tempo, insisting that songs should only be 80 to 116 beats per minute (BPM).

Quite how the ridiculous limits would be enforced, is a mystery, but the rules would make most of the songs we listen to today a big fat HeT. Ironically, the grandiose Russian national anthem – usually played at a tempo of 76 BPM – will also now be too slow.

Chechnya’s Culture Ministry said, when it made the announcement last week on Telegram, that it had been carrying out “a huge amount of work” on the issue of compliance of Chechen musical, vocal and choreographic compositions with the “Chechen mentality.”

“The musical culture of the Chechens was diverse in tempo and methodology,” Dadaev was quoted as saying. “We must bring to the people and to the future of our children the cultural heritage of the Chechen people.”

That includes the customs and traditions and “features of the Chechen character, which includes the entire spectrum of moral and ethical standards of life of the Chechens,” he said.

Chechnya is a conservative Muslim-majority republic in the North Caucasus which has remained part of Russia even after it waged two brutal wars for independence in the late 1990s and early 2000s. Despite still being part of Putinland, it has maintained its distinctive culture, language and traditions. All of which apparently operates on a mid-90 tempo.

The Culture Ministry’s Telegram post added that the BPM limits had been approved by President Ramzan Kadyrov, who has maintained a tight grip on power in the republic since he became president in 2007.

President Kadyrova big supporter of Russian President Vladimir Putin, and has allegedly been allowed to get away with corruption, rights violations against women and repression of members of the LGBTQ community.

Now, his dumbassery has been extended to music, or more specifically ‘Western music’.

Next on the list of things to ban in the land of weird ideas might just be walking too fast, so if you find yourself Grozny, try and stick to a steady penguin-pace. Too bad for these okes:

[source:nbc]