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December 8, 2023

Facebook Group Dedicated To Identifying Men Who Should Be Avoided On Dating Apps “Extremely Concerning”

Women post the images of the men they've started seeing or chatting with from dating apps, and the other women in the group then give their blessing or their warning.

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Women have often needed to band together to protect themselves against some men riddled with red flags, but some are worried that they might be taking it a little too far on social media.

The BBC reported that a social media group set up to name men who should be avoided on dating apps has been described as “extremely concerning”.

The private Facebook group “Are We Dating The Same Guy Belfast/ Derry/ Northern Ireland” is 25,000 members strong, with mostly women sharing the ‘tea’ and the ‘red flags’ of the men they’re dating.

Image: Facebook

Screenshots of texts, pics and shinanigans – or the ‘receipts’ as the bits of evidence are called – are posted on the group to call out the men who have, for example, cheated, lied, ghosted, sexually assaulted, or domestically abused women in the past.

The aforementioned group says its purposes range from warning women “about liars and abusers”, to being a place to enquire about someone you are dating.

Women post the images of the men they’ve started seeing or chatting with from dating apps, and the other women in the group then give their blessing or their warning.

While this seems like a smart idea, generally, as men are statistically the more dangerous gender, Charity Men’s Alliance NI is worried that these “character assassinations online” can lead to deterioration in mental health.

BBC News NI has seen comments which raise serious concerns and allegations about men.

Jack, not his real name, told BBC News NI, that when he found out he was on the site, posted by a woman asking for information about him, his “heart sank”.

“To think that my face and name was posted up for people to comment on without me knowing – it made me paranoid that anything said would be taken as the truth even if it wasn’t,” he said. “However, I do realise if used properly that it’s there for any females who may have reservations about guys.”

While these damning online anecdotes can be hurtful for some men, it is simply not proportionate to the number of women hurt at the hands of abusive men.

[source:bbc]