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To borrow words from English philosopher Thomas Hobbes, these horrendous date stories make life seem “solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short”.

Dating has never been easy – hark back to the days when debutants entered high society to find an eligible bachelor, where on both ends immense social pressures resulted in some odd matches and awful situations.

Nowadays, the playing field is a lot more liberal, but still, social capital and at least a smidgen of social skills are pivotal if you are hoping for a second date (never mind a relationship).

With so many dating apps and faces to swipe on and like, there is constantly plenty of fish in the sea, which is both a blessing and a curse.

BuzzFeed asked readers to share some of the wildest, weirdest, and most unpleasant date stories. Lo and behold, they are quite something.

From the stingy to the obsessive, from the fake all the way to the downright sad, these stories should help ease the pain of your own dating woes. Unless you have a worse story to tell, which is not at all impossible, I am afraid to say.

You may get a date that is disgusting on a few levels:

He told me he still lived with his ex-girlfriend because he couldn’t break the lease. I foolishly agreed to go on a second date with him, which went well. He invited me back to his place — he said his ex wasn’t there because she was staying at a friend’s house. When he opened the door I was hit in the face with the smell of really bad cat pee, like a litter box that hasn’t been changed in months. The apartment was a disaster: There was cat puke on the floor, trash everywhere. I tried to overlook it as he said that was one of the reasons that led to their breakup — she was really messy and unorganized.

The unfortunate lady then learnt that he still shared a room with his ex. Yes, it gets worse:

I looked down and saw a pair of his ex’s dirty underwear next to my feet. I think I slept for a total of 20 minutes that night. I still see him on the apps, and it takes everything in me not to make a petty remark and ask if he’s still sharing a bed with his ex.

Sometimes, the masculinity is incredibly fragile:

The guy had photoshopped himself to be much taller than he was. He was an hour late and he bragged about himself the whole time — how he was fluent in Russian, was on a jury and corrected the judge on the law and the judge thanked him. It was crazy. Halfway through the meal, he went to the restroom and was in there for over 30 minutes. While he was in there a bunch of the servers came over to ask what was going on. They asked me if the date was a dare or a blind date. They helped me pay for my food [quickly] and get outta there. I had to block his number because he didn’t stop calling.

If a date could be a rollercoaster ride, this is what it would look like:

He picks me up in his Mustang and he starts going a little fast, but I’m a fast driver so no worries. Then he starts hauling ass and weaving through traffic. I’m freaking out but trying to play it cool — eventually we get to the movies. He pulls out a full-size bottle of vodka (half full) and asks if I want some. I decline. As stupid as it is, I ride home with him, and I get to experience even worse driving, since he’s tacked on a few drinks at this point. Pulls up to drop me off and tries to invite himself in. I manage to reject his offer and get inside. He proceeds to text me that he’d like to SHAVE me sometime. Never spoke to him again. Need a shower after typing this.

There are many of us who have a story about someone “losing their wallet”, or having an incredibly uncomfortable and unconventional living situation, but these oddball dating stories take the cake, no?

You’re allowed to feel better now.

Anyway, no matter how bad it gets, at least there’s always the story, right?

[source:buzzfeed]