[imagesource: Edinburgh Festival Fringe]

The 2022 Edinburgh Festival Fringe kicked off on August 5 and will run until August 29.

That means today marks the halfway point of the festival and we may as well take a break and enjoy a chuckle.

In years gone by, we have called it the Edinburgh Fringe Festival but this time we shall go with the official name from the event’s website.

Ahead of the festival, performers revealed their best one-liners to drum up interest in their shows. How have they done? I dunno, but The Guardian has “whittled down gags galore from this year’s stand-ups” and handpicked a dozen of their favourites.

Off we go:

Michael Spicer: Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw someone from work on a Saturday.

Susie McCabe: What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

Lou Sanders: I asked if I could change the vaccine I was getting and the guy said he’d get his supervisor. I thought that was like Pfizer but a really, really good one.

Eryn Tett: A spiritual guidance teacher playing hide and seek with kids: “All right, well, you guys go hide. And find yourselves.”

Ignacio Lopez: I come from a long line of immigrants. No, seriously, the queue was massive – the first thing they teach you when you move to the UK is queuing.

Olaf Falafel: I spent the whole morning building a time machine – that’s four hours of my life I’m definitely getting back.

Dads around the world have stashed that last one for use at some stage.

The final six:

Sophie Duker: Don’t knock threesomes. Having a threesome is like hiring an intern to do all the jobs you hate.

Ari Eldjárn: I never wanted a beard. But then it grew on me.

Tessa Coates: Got arrested for relaxing at a campsite the other day – loitering within tent.

Amy Gledhill: I’m from a little place I like to call York. I shouldn’t, because it’s pronounced Hull.

Michael Akadiri: Being a doctor in comedy has got me some fans. I had a guy book tickets to see me because it was the quickest way to get a doctor’s appointment.

Jessica Fostekew: I haven’t got the energy for a hot girl summer. I’m aiming for a warm woman spring

A mixed bag – perhaps by the end of the festival we’ll be able to put together a list of real zingers.

By the way, Time Out has a list of all the best joke winners from previous years. My favourite three are:

2009 – Dan Antopolski: ‘Hedgehogs – why can’t they just share the hedge?’

2016 – Masai Graham: ‘My dad has suggested that I register for a donor card. He’s a man after my own heart.’

2018 – Adam Rowe: ‘Working at the job centre has to be a tense job: knowing that if you get fired, you still have to come in the next day.’

That’s more than enough fun for one Wednesday.

Back to the slog and grind.

[sources:guardian&timeout]