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Happy Friday, good people.

Let’s kick things off with a silly story about the price of a Woolies rotisserie chicken these days.

I’ve always felt the best way to shop at Woolies is to throw things into your basket without checking the price. Ignorance is bliss, as they say.

However, for the purpose of the below, we must start by pointing out that a Woolies rotisserie chicken (medium, nogal) is now retailing for R99,99.

The product description starts with “Go for convenience” which is basically Woolies-speak for “you’re paying over the odds”, to be fair.

For clarity, here is said rotisserie chicken in its natural habitat:

That R99,99 price tag and the recent R10 price hike were pointed out by a Twitter user, reports IOL, and the pile-on began:

Hi @WOOLWORTHS_SA, why is your Rotisserie chicken now R99.99 from R89.99? Did it get a degree or pay off it’s Nsfas or something?

— Vho Elon Masakhane | avendas.co.za|vendavendor.btc (@VendaVendor) July 11, 2022

The jokes came thick and fast:

It’s for the petrol to drop the chicken off at private school.

— Louisa Theart (@louisaflute) July 12, 2022

This chicken doesn’t qualify for NSFAS. It’s family income is too high. It has to pay back it’s parents for the two bedroom apartment it had while studying on the farm

— Akshay (@AskAkshayKaran) July 12, 2022

Even the Sunday deal for 2 roast chickens is now R155 up from R140. Two stocks I should have invested in, Woolworths chicken and avocados. Are we blaming Russian invasion, petrol hikes or Eskom this time?

— Kristina Gubic (@africanscribe) July 12, 2022

The price of petrol to “cross the road “ has increased!

— Muhamed-Nur Nordien (@nordienmn) July 12, 2022

How have we made it this far without mentioning the COVID-19 lockdown ban on the sale of roast chicken?

It’s true – in April 2020, Trade and Industry Minister Ebrahim Patel announced that the selling of hot food by supermarkets was outlawed by lockdown regulations.

We have come a long way since then.

At least somebody on Twitter was sympathetic to the chicken’s plight:

Bathong! This is the very same chicken NDZ banned during Lockdown 5. It has been through the most. We will allow the R10 🤣🤣🤣

— Shells (@RochelleBarrish) July 14, 2022

If you want to go free range, you will have to fork out R104,99. The product description says the chickens “are never given routine antibiotics or growth hormones and fed a diet of grains and pulses”.

They’re also “free to enjoy the outdoors during the day and roost safely indoors at night”.

But yeah, that price hike has also been noticed:

It was R79.99 in Jan 🤧 the free range is now R104.99. Woolies what’s happening vele, take us into your confidence.

— Pinky Sithole 💗 (@pinkysithole17) July 11, 2022

What else at Woolies is taking the piss? We’ve often had a go at the avo prices but I’m prone to making bad life choices in the aisle while I wait to pay.

Two prime candidates are the mango strips and the biltong.

200 grams of mango strips at Woolies will set you back R84,99. Meanwhile, at Clicks, 400 grams is R159. A small saving, but nothing massive.

In fact, maybe we should cut Woolies some slack here. It also sells a 500-gram bulk pack for R199,99 and Montagu Snacks, a brand known especially for selling dried fruits and nuts, sells their 500-gram pack for R198,90.

When it comes to biltong, there are also a few surprises. Woolies is flogging its 400-gram pack of Original Sliced Beef Biltong for R179,99, and a 350-gram pack at Pick n Pay goes for R164,99. You can buy a kilogram from Checkers for R329,99, so I guess you’re winning there.

But then you have a kilo of biltong at home and you open the packet and voila, you’ve eaten yourself into a coma.

I still maintain that Woolies stings you with the little convenience packs in the aisles, though. R29 bucks for a 35-gram pack which I will smash in two handfuls? You’re having a laugh.

Anyway, on with the day.

[source:iol]