[imagesource: Associated Press]

Noel and Liam Gallagher are rock ‘n roll royalty, and during the rise and rise of Oasis in the mid-1990s they were two of the most famous faces on the planet.

The brothers’ less than amicable split is the stuff of legend (case in point, Noel saying he liked his mother until she gave birth to Liam) and if you haven’t yet seen it, take a moment to watch Supersonic.

The 2016 doccie charts “the incredible true story of the meteoric rise, chaotic reign, and epic explosion of the legendary rock band”.

Ahead of the release of Liam’s third solo album, C’MON YOU KNOW, he answered a number of pressing questions from readers of The Guardian.

Please ensure you read all answers in his accent:

pic.twitter.com/V09iKnDOeH

— Liam Gallagher (@liamgallagher) May 16, 2022

Before we get to the kidney question, here are a few gems.

Question – I am fascinated by your story of not feeling music until you were hit on the head with a hammer. What happened exactly?

I was 14, 15, having a cigarette with my mates, and a few lads came down from another school, hoods up, and one of them whacked me on the head with a hammer. Not a big, massive mallet – one of those little small ones. I ended up in hospital and, after that, I just started hearing music differently. My girlfriend at the time was really into Madonna.

She’d play Like a Virgin and I’d say: “I’m not having this shit.” Then I got hit on the head with a hammer and thought: “This is actually a tune.” So whoever hit me, I’d like to meet and thank, else I’d still be on the dole.

Oasis fans around the world thank you for wielding that hammer, random person.

What scares you?

Spiders. And mice. My cats – Sid and Nancy – are always bringing in mice, which I know is supposed to be a present, but I just can’t handle it. Things that go faster than me can do one. If I was on that jungle programme [I’m a Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here!], the ratings would go through the roof. I’m a proper big shitbag with things like that.

I get the feeling Noel has jotted that down. Incoming delivery of spiders and mice to Liam’s residence from an unknown sender.

Let’s talk kidneys.

If Noel’s life depended on a new kidney and you were the only donor match, would you give him one of yours? 

Without a doubt. Of course I would. He’s my brother, man, and I love him. I’d give you one as well, mate. Do I think he’d give me one of his? Yeah.

Ahh, it’s great to see some brotherly love shining through.

Perhaps bygones can be bygones and there’s a chance of an Oasis reunion at some point.

I should probably show you the rest of Liam’s answer to the kidney question:

He’s all bravado. He and all his celebrity mates just get up their own arses. I’m sure they’re good people, but they’re very insecure.

Am I surprised I’ve ended up more successful? It depends what you judge by success. I’m sure Noel’s very happy in his world. He wrote some great songs and I sang them. It’s the voice that people want to hear. I could get someone to play Noel’s guitar parts 10 a penny. Noel can’t get anyone to sing like me.

Go ahead and scrap any idea of a reunion.

On the off chance you ever walk past Liam and want to make a solid first impression, he recommends asking, “Are you the one and only Liam Gallagher?” while bowing as you approach.

Bugger it – let’s end on a high:

[source:guardian]