[imagesource: Instagram / Piers Morgan]

This Saturday, Cristiano Ronaldo will complete his much-heralded return to Old Trafford against Newcastle United.

You wouldn’t bet against him banging a few in, because he’s a superb footballer and Newcastle United are a mess.

CR7 jerseys are selling in huge numbers, Fantasy Premier League players are transferring him in en masse, and fanboys the world over are giddy with excitement.

You can add Piers Morgan to that last group.

If you pop past his Twitter account (I did so you don’t have to), you’ll see his pinned tweet is from his 2019 interview with the Portuguese superstar:

Yes, Piers, what rock-hard abs you possess.

Let’s just hope Ronaldo never ghosts Piers.

We know he didn’t take it very well when Meghan Markle cut ties.

Writing for The Daily Mail, a suitable outlet for his columns, Piers gushed about Ronaldo, and recounted large parts of their conversation from that 2019 interview.

Including that time Ronaldo dressed in disguise:

‘It was soon after I joined Real Madrid in 2009 and it was New Year’s Eve and I really wanted to go out but it would have been impossible.

‘So I put on a long wig and fake moustache, big sunglasses, a crazy jacket and we took our girlfriends to this hotel rooftop bar discotheque in central Madrid and we had a great time for many hours. It was one of the best nights I ever had, because I felt free again.’

Apparently, his disguise allowed him to time travel because nobody uses the word ‘discotheque’ any longer.

Piers then pivots seamlessly into talking about a conversation he had with Princess Diana. You’ll be hard-pressed to find anybody who name-drops harder.

Back to the Ronaldo love-in:

In a woke-ravaged world that increasingly seems to celebrate failure and weakness more than success and in which quitting in sport is now inexplicably seen as brave and heroic, Ronaldo is a refreshingly unashamed advocate of winning and resilience…

Since meeting Ronaldo in late 2019, we’ve become unlikely mates. We speak on the phone from time to time and chat frequently on WhatsApp about everything from football and fast cars to yachts, coronavirus and fatherhood.

Piers says that he told Ronaldo he wanted them to have the “greatest interview ever”.

Ronaldo then phoned Piers after it aired and said “You were right – it was the greatest! Top! No 1!”

Insert Borat thumbs-up picture.

His column goes on, and on, and on, so excuse me if I skip ahead to the end:

I’ve met and interviewed a lot of sporting legends in my 30 years as a journalist and broadcaster. None has impressed me as much as Ronaldo, on and off the pitch.

As Donald Trump once told me about Muhammad Ali: ‘If you talk the talk, you’ve gotta walk the walk, or the act doesn’t play. Ali talked the talk, but he won.’

…’Great to have you back in the Premier League,’ I messaged him when the news broke. ‘Just please don’t score against Arsenal.’

‘Thanks, my friend,’ he replied, seconds later.

He replied immediately. Piers wants that on the record, as well as the fact that Ronaldo told him “you’ll be coming to my wedding, Piers, don’t worry.”

Would Piers shred Ronaldo if he didn’t keep his word? Probably not to the degree he did with Meghan Markle, for obvious reasons.

There was no mention of the allegations against Ronaldo.

Feel free to waste your own Monday reading Piers’ full column here, as I tap out.

[source:dailymail]