[imagesource: @Kyenedy / Twitter]

On Tuesday, images of a Jaguar F-Type that had ploughed into the outside section of the Botanicum Café & Grill, at the High Constantia Shopping Centre, started doing the rounds.

A car crash is nothing special, but it was the car’s number plate, “2FAST4U WP“, that really captured the imagination.

Cue endless horrid puns, and when video footage of the moment the driver accelerated into the outside seating went viral, 2FAST4U’s 15 minutes of internet fame seemed to be complete.

Not quite, though, because now the woman behind the wheel, 69-year-old trucking company boss Erica Holt, has come forward to tell her side of the story.

This from TimesLIVE:

“So, when I came into the parking my foot slipped off the brake and onto the petrol and then I had already had the first bump probably, because what went through my mind is I don’t know what’s happening with my car,” she told TimesLIVE.

“I’m braking and the more it went forward the more I pushed the pedal down. It’s one of those freak accidents, you know. It is what it is, it happened, and it happened so quickly because it is a powerful car.”

…She said she had a tray of 30 eggs on the front seat which she had bought from a nearby deli, but despite the car mounting a pole and a large concrete plant container the eggs survived and so did she.

We’re really happy nobody was hurt, and just plain delighted the eggs made it through unscathed.

As long as they were free-range. Down with battery eggs!

It would be remiss of us not to mention the information that has been widely shared across WhatsApp and social media, through voicenotes and forwarded messages, regarding what those familiar with Holt’s car have said about her driving habits.

For example, one voicenote from somebody who works at the shopping centre has the following to say:

We’ve always seen this number plate down at the office…she pulls up in front of patrons and then revs it a little bit before switching off so that they can all hear her V8…

It made such a noise we all just jumped…We’ve always said, what a [insult redacted]…

Yeah, the voicenote finished with a rather uncomplimentary jibe which we’ll omit.

Holt, on the other hand, was not happy with the reaction from the public, and it seems as though she wants to speak to the manager.

To start, here’s what she had to say about how Capetonians are nastier than those from Jozi:

“I have noticed that the Capetonians are very different to the [Gauteng] people, and they don’t like the sun to shine over anybody’s head and especially if it’s a woman who’s been successful, and that’s their prerogative,” she said…

“That’s why you haven’t seen any reaction in the media from me, because I don’t want to go there.

“I do a lot of shopping in Constantia, and the Constantia ladies, they’re all like that. They drive around in their husbands’ cars and they don’t like women to have nice cars and things, that’s what it is.”

I don’t want to go there, followed immediately by going there.

Damn, Constantia ladies, the gauntlet has been thrown down. Don your finest activewear and unite!

Holt says she bought the car herself two years ago, adding that the number plate was a “funny joke” because the F-Type was, at the time, the fastest car that Jaguar had ever made.

As for the claims that she often revved the car before pulling in for a late brunch, Holt said that was a feature of the car:

“With that car, you’ve got buttons on there that you press. You don’t have to rev that car, it revs on its own. It’s one of those noisy cars where it’s got different baffles in the exhaust pipes and everything,” she said.

“You know, people think because you drive a fancy car you’re full of nonsense, you’ve done it all…I drive and I enjoyed that with my car and it just takes me to another dimension … and you forget about all of the stuff you have to deal with.”

I, too, love being taken to another dimension. Sounds like she’s living her best life.

However, I’m just not sure that smack-talking “Constantia ladies” that “drive around in their husbands’ cars” was the best move, though.

Something tells me Holt could be hearing muffled whispers through face masks next time she’s shopping at the local Woolies.

We did feature this video two days back, but it seems like a good place to finish:

[source:timeslive]