I think it’s safe to say that it’s no longer ‘business as usual’ now that we have a global pandemic on our hands.

Everyone has been encouraged to self-isolate, and work from home. 

As The Tab puts it, “enjoyment is thin on the ground”.

For those who want to make things interesting, however, “a little pandemic isn’t going to stop your weed man dropping you a bag”, especially in the UK.

Just as mutual aid groups are springing up across the country, with neighbours eager to lend a hand to those in need, dealers are doing their bit to ease to burden for their customers.

Some dealers are providing lists of things to make the “weekend go faster”:

If that doesn’t appeal to you, some freebies might:

We live in a world now where dealers are handing out free rolls of loo paper with deliveries. Let that sink in.

If you’re worried about that shady hand-to-hand cash exchange, they’ve got you covered:

Finally, all bags will be “wipped”:

This level of ingenuity isn’t new for cocaine dealers in England. Before the virus, they were labelling their goodies “ethically sourced” and “vegan” to appeal to the ‘environmentally conscious’ coke heads out there.

Look if you want to waste your money, talk utter nonsense to everyone trapped with you in your home while destroying your nasal cavity and the environment, be my guest.

Just consider the implications of buying something that you’re going to put in your nose from someone who can’t spell ‘wiped’.

[source:tab]