To be perfectly honest, I couldn’t care less about whether or not Meghan and Harry are part of the Royal Family.

When you break it down, the whole idea of a monarchy in the UK is only really tolerated because the Royals pulled some serious PR moves during the French Revolution, and later because the Queen does wonderful things for tourism in a country that’s mostly rain and bland food.

Regardless, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex’s announcement that they’re going to be going their own way from now on before Meghan jetted back to Canada has made international headlines, and a lot of people seem to be very angry about the whole thing.

No one is angrier than Piers Morgan, but to be fair, ‘angry’ seems to be his default setting when it comes to Meghan Markle.

Not one to miss an opportunity to go nuclear on Meghan and Harry, Piers penned a piece for his favourite online publication, The Daily Mail.

He gets straight to it:

Who the f**k do they think they are?

Seriously?

I’ve seen some disgraceful royal antics in my time, but for pure arrogance, entitlement, greed, and wilful disrespect, nothing has ever quite matched the behaviour of the ‘Duke and Duchess of Sussex.’

I put inverted commas around those titles because I sincerely hope they won’t exist much longer.

Tell us how you really feel, Piers.

He goes on to call them “deluded clowns” before talking about what he would do if he was Queen.

Indeed, if I were Her Majesty the Queen, I would unceremoniously strip Harry and Meghan of all their titles with immediate effect and despatch them back into civilian life.

When was Harry a civilian?

Piers then compares the couple to Putin and the Kardashians.

They also, hilariously, laid down their new rulebook for the media, saying they’re getting rid of the traditional Royal Rota system and will instead be inviting special favoured journalists to attend their events and only write nice positive things about them.

I chuckled with disbelief as I read this.

Even Vladimir Putin wouldn’t pull a stunt to control the press like that.

Luckily there is zero chance of the media following any ‘rules’ for covering these two now they’ve swapped royal duty for money-grabbing celebrity stardom.

If they want to be the new Kardashians, they’ll get treated like the new Kardashians.

It goes on and on, and on. If you want to read the whole thing, follow this link.

Before you do, though, let’s take a moment to get the bottom of what this is really about, because predictably, this has less to do with #Megxit and more to do with Piers taking every opportunity to talk about that time Meghan ghosted him.

I’ve made no secret of my dislike for, and distrust of Meghan.

We were friends for a while, or I thought we were.

She certainly told the world we were in publicly posted tweets (now deleted) before most people in Britain had ever heard of her, and while she was asking me in my local pub for media advice.

But from the moment she met Prince Harry, I was discarded faster than a piece of chewing gum stuck to the bottom of her Louboutin heels.

For other times he used some slight supposedly perpetrated by the royal couple as an excuse to bring this up, go here, here, here and, here.

Piers concludes his rant with this message for the Queen:

Get rid of these whining, ego-crazed, deluded leeches Ma’am – before it’s too late.

Too late for what, exactly?

I think we can rest easy in the knowledge that Piers Morgan is probably very low on the list of people that HRH Liz will listen to.

[source:dailymail]