Life is full of unanswered mysteries.

What happened at Roswell back in 1947? Did Steven Avery murder Teresa Halbach? Why did the Proteas decide that they were allergic to bowling yorkers at this World Cup?

Sadly, we may never know the answers to those questions, but we can, finally, wrap up an intensive investigation into what the lyrics of ‘Gangnam Style’ actually mean.

We say intensive, but Seth read this article about the scandal rocking the world of K-Pop, Googled ‘english lyrics gangnam style’, and found the answer.

We leave no turn unstoned stone unturned.

Here’s the music video, in case you need a quick reminder:

3,35 billion views and climbing.

Now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for – the lyrics, via K International:

Oppa is Gangnam style
Gangnam style

A girl who is warm and humanly during the day
A classy girl who know how to enjoy the freedom of a cup of coffee
A girl whose heart gets hotter when night comes
A girl with that kind of twist

I’m a guy
A guy who is as warm as you during the day
A guy who one-shots his coffee before it even cools down
A guy whose heart bursts when night comes
That kind of guy

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let’s go until the end

Oppa is Gangnam style, Gangnam style
Oppa is Gangnam style, Gangnam style
Oppa is Gangnam style

Eh- Sexy Lady, Oppa is Gangnam style
Eh- Sexy Lady oh oh oh oh

A girl who looks quiet but plays when she plays
A girl who puts her hair down when the right time comes
A girl who covers herself but is more sexy than a girl who bares it all
A sensible girl like that

I’m a guy
A guy who seems calm but plays when he plays
A guy who goes completely crazy when the right time comes
A guy who has bulging ideas rather than muscles
That kind of guy

Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Beautiful, loveable
Yes you, hey, yes you, hey
Now let’s go until the end

Oppa is Gangnam style, Gangnam style
Oppa is Gangnam style, Gangnam style
Oppa is Gangnam style

Eh- Sexy Lady, Oppa is Gangnam style
Eh- Sexy Lady oh oh oh oh

On top of the running man is the flying man, baby baby
I’m a man who knows a thing or two
On top of the running man is the flying man, baby baby
I’m a man who knows a thing or two

You know what I’m saying
Oppa is Gangnam style

Eh- Sexy Lady, Oppa is Gangnam style
Eh- Sexy Lady oh oh oh oh

Wow, where to begin?

How about “a guy who one-shots his coffee before it even cools down”? Watch out, everyone, he means business. I bet he doesn’t even blow on his tea before he takes a sip.

Let’s also take a moment for “a guy who has bulging ideas rather than muscles”. Splendid stuff.

This concludes today’s foray into ‘pointless shit nobody needs to know’. Thanks for stopping by.

[source:kinternational]