After Leon Kirkinis, the former African Bank CEO who suffered a massive fall from grace, resigned in 2014, he put his Rooi-Els mansion – often referred to as ‘the glass house’ – on the market.

He then rejected an offer of R30 million in 2016 after the property, which Kirkinis helped design himself, had been on the market for R70 million for two years.

It eventually sold, and has been off the market for a while.

Now it’s back up for grabs, which means that we once again get a look at the goods.

Here’s Property24:

This uniquely designed, spacious, double storey 4 bedroom villa creates a truly distinctive space, in which adherence to the ebbs and flows of nature throughout the year is at the very core.

Sounds like the house is trying to get its yoga practice up and running. It gets more esoteric.

Private secluded courtyards offer tranquillity and panoramic views of False Bay are plentiful. The dramatic vistas, available from every angle, are in constant flux, according to the season, the light and the elements.

Nature’s gifts just keep on coming, friends.

Enjoy nature’s entertainment, from the lively seabirds on the boulders, to the balletic moves of seals, dolphins and sometimes orcas.

The exceptional insulation of plentiful, highest calibre glass panels make this a quiet and private sanctuary for the soul with flexible spaces in and around the house.

Orcas are only sometimes balletic. The ones in the Western Cape, or two in particular, can also be precision hunters.

Also, the word ‘plentiful’ is being thrown around a lot here.

The really jarring part is that the tone of the listing suddenly switches to this:

Viewings will be offered to pre-qualified purchasers at their convenience.

I’m assuming a giant pile of money and some aligned chakras are a prerequisite for a viewing.

Otherwise, you’re told to namaste away.

[source:property24]