Before today, I had never heard of Michael Bisping.

I sort of wish it had stayed that way, because he sounds like the kind of human I would give a very wide berth to.

Bisping is a decorated former UFC fighter who will shortly be inducted into the sport’s Hall of Fame. He’s also filming a show called Warrior in Cape Town, and it doesn’t sound like he’s taken much of a liking to the city.

Whilst chatting on a podcast called Believe You Me, Bisping described an early morning where he arrived back at his hotel, only to be accosted by “the locals”.

First of all, the podcast host, Luis Gomez, is asked about his impression of Cape Town. He responds by saying there’s probably lots of wildlife and tribes, who aren’t used to seeing white people.

They also use “blow darts with poison on the end” and “some sort of spears”. As you can tell, this is going to be a very informed and nuanced conversation between the two blokes.

Other ‘highlights’ include Bisping saying that any property left unoccupied for 24 hours is instantly set upon, and possibly the worst attempt at a Cape Town accent ever.

Move over, Leo in Blood Diamond – you’ve been outdone.

If you can stomach it, start from the 1:45 mark. and it’s all action for the next 10 minutes:

Wow. How about the images that have been chosen in the video above?

At least at some point, the podcast host tries to point out the obvious – that Bisping is being blatantly racist, and more than likely completely misjudged the situation.

How about this ‘burnt out cop car’ that arrives and tells him to hop in? Who are these people? What the actual hell is this guy talking about?

Also, and this is very important, but also clearly not the biggest question from this diatribe – where was his hotel?

Yes, naysayers, Cape Town is full of crime, but this Bisping guy was pissed off his trolly and is trying to sound hardcore.

Mate, this city doesn’t need your shite. Finish filming your TV show and piss right off.

[source:bloodyelbow]