So you want to join the fine folk of the Atlantic Seaboard, prancing across the promenade and Instagramming sunsets daily, even though the rest of the city can see them, too.

You do know that, right?

Some of the most expensive streets and suburbs can be found along the Seaboard, but we decided to see what you can get if you go for the lower end of the market.

We are going to skip over the R1,6 million and R1,7 million apartments if you don’t mind, and go for an option just the other side of two bar.

Pam Golding has a listing in Mouille Point for R2,1 million, and that is where we will do our snooping.

First things first – I see a pineapple light thingy in that picture above, and that knocks the price down to R2 million. Pineapples don’t belong on pizzas, and they don’t belong on property listings.

Secondly, you’re getting 32 square metres on Beach Road for your money. That’s a cool R65 625 per square metre. That’s who we are now.

The write-up, then:

Quaint renovated studio apartment perfectly positioned for Airbnb. Situated on the top floor this apartment enjoys the sense of space the moment you walk in with exposed trusses and a light fresh feel.

Fully functional kitchen…

…and modern bathroom with a shower/bath combo.

I don’t know about you, but I firmly believe that a bathroom should be a place of sanctuary. It’s for peace and quiet, self-reflection, and swiping through Tinder.

Now you’re telling me I have to listen to the washing machine whirring away whilst I ponder the meaning of life?

Mouille Point is a lifestyle destination and is on the door step to the promenade so get out and enjoy the outdoors by taking evening walks and enjoy the fantastic restaurants which are in the same vicinity.

Would I like to own this studio apartment? Yes, because I would take owning anything over paying rent for the rest of my life.

The next time someone over the age of 50 cracks on about Millennials and how they’re so entitled and all that jazz, be sure to thank them for destroying the property market for the rest of us.

All we want is to sit on the toilet in peace – is that too much to ask?

[source:pamgolding]