[imagesource:here]

This story was titled ‘Seth’s Review Of The iPhone X’, but the sub-editors felt obliged to change it…

I’m currently rolling with the iPhone X (256GB). I want you to know that. I feel compelled to tell you because nobody seems to be be noticing.

As a lover of tech, I enjoy a good “what are your thoughts on the new XYZ” chat. As an ‘early adopter’, I enjoy forming opinions based on my own experience and bestowing those opinions on the ‘early majority’. It’s nice to give a fancy marketing name to what is, essentially, an only child who simply must have all the toys, first.

As a grown man (still an only child), one realises that one cannot walk into a public place and scream “I’VE GOT THE IPHONE X!!!!!” Especially in Cape Town. People will be quick to label you a ‘prick’ or a ‘tool.’

One needs to be more subtle.

I remember when the iPhone 6 came out. Bruce Good was in New York when it launched, and it was because of this unplanned fluke timing that he was able to acquire an iPhone 6 and return to Cape Town before I had mine. I would classify Bruce as part of the ‘late majority’ or even ‘laggard’ – so you can only imagine my horror (his joy) when I was left sitting with my iPhone 5 up my arse.

What made things worse is we were in each other’s company most days and, because the iPhone 6 was such a departure from the iPhone 5, every second passer-by would ask him if they could look at it and stroke it like a puppy.

Now I know every new iPhone packs even more of a punch but holy shit, the iPhone X – this is a big deal. So you can imagine my frustration that nobody recognises it. Let me explain.

The iPhone X’s screen is BIGGER than the iPhone 7+ (my former iPhone). In fact it’s the biggest iPhone screen ever. But because there is no border and the screen runs to all corners of the face of the phone, the actual phone casing is MUCH smaller than the iPhone 7+. So much smaller, in fact, that it looks like a normal iPhone 6 or iPhone 7. Which brings me to my point.

I’m not able to tell everyone my thoughts and opinion on the iPhone X, because nobody notices it sitting directly in front of them. I’ve taken to leaving the screen on, hoping they’ll notice the full screen and famous ‘notch’ on the top of the display.

Which I quite like. If there wasn’t a notch at the top, people might think it’s a Samsung. God forbid.

I found myself at a plumbing shop in the Cape Town CBD the day I got the iPhone. That was when I started telling people I had the iPhone X on me and would be happy to answer any questions. So I said to the two chaps helping me, “this is the iPhone X – do you want to have a closer look?”

“Not really,” came the one guy’s reply.

Hmph..

It was so obvious that he was an angry Samsung user. I pitied him and removed myself and my iPhone X (256GB) from his God-forsaken premises.

They didn’t even have the basin pipe I needed. Idiots.

Ja, so…. in terms of the standout features… If you’re worried about losing your precious home button, you need to get over it because, honey, life is SWEET without it. I was forced to touch an iPhone 7 this week and it felt like I was visiting my old dorm room. Fun to check out and reminisce, but I won’t be spending a night there. Seriously though – once you get it (flick up from the bottom does what home button used to do) you end up getting around much faster. Bringing up your currently open apps is also very easy – slide finger up from bottom to halfway and then pause.

The facial recognition is not a gimmick, that I can say for sure. The amount of times it would have been easier for me to use a fingerprint are few and far between. If you compare the amount of times the fingerprint reader can’t read your print (if you’re sweaty after a run or have very hot hands) to the amount of times the facial recognition doesn’t perform beautifully, the discussion is a non-starter.

Before I used it I thought it was just a sexy new way to authenticate, but I didn’t take into account the usability. Facial recognition is definitely, without doubt, where we have to be heading for things to become smoother and seemingly intuitive. There is a little face outline that spins when it does it, but it’s so quick you often don’t notice it. To open your banking app and go straight to your account without even noticing the authentication process, is something to behold. It almost feels like something is wrong.

So – to summarise – the standout features for me are:

1. Nobody will know you have the iPhone X (because it looks as small as an iPhone 7 but secretly has the biggest iPhone screen ever)
2. No home button is a better life
3. Facial recognition is a complete game changer – far more than I had ever imagined

Hey, did you catch this one?

 

That’s all I have for you right now.

Make sure you order your iPhone X urgently from Digicape and be a better person in general.