If you’re a male of a certain age, Transformers will always be remembered for Megan Fox digging under the bonnet.

You remember it too, don’t you?

The franchise peaked in the first and second instalments, but Michael Bay soldiers on with movie number five.

Titled Transformers: The Last Knight, it’s really taking a beating when it comes to review time.

We’ll start with Gizmodo:

The Last Knight has so much story in it, so much useless information pummeled into every single scene, there is no room for anything else. There’s no room for nuance, no room for character development, no room for logic, emotion, or even true excitement.

…the whole thing is executed with such a staggering over-seriousness that even when it attempts moments of levity, they almost always fall flat.

Generally I wouldn’t spend hundreds of words of a review doing a laundry list of the plot points of a movie, but that’s almost entirely what The Last Knight consists of. The remaining screentime is just left for random insanity…

Time and space is largely disregarded as characters drive from Chicago to North Dakota in minutes and Cybertron crashes into the Moon with no consequences. Characters disappear for hours at a time. All of this opens up tons of gaping plot holes…

Make no mistake: Transformers: The Last Knight is not a good movie. Actually, it’s more like five not good movies stuffed into one.

I tell you who really doesn’t dig this movie – the Guardian:

We’re talking about the same steroidal infantilism as the previous four films, the same epic of tinnitus-inducing pointlessness that audiences have come to love or hate or sullenly wait to be over. Like so many of Michael Bay’s movies, it is a machine for converting your brain matter into soup…

One more from IGN:

One of the main issues with the characters in The Last Knight is that they don’t just act the way they’re feeling, they announce almost every single mood they have out loud despite it being blatantly obvious…

A recycled plot told through an overly on-the-nose script, read by a confusing parade of characters, and muddled action scenes does nothing to justify its epic length.

Of course you want to see the trailer:

Don’t mind me, I’ll just be giving this one a skip.

[sources:gizmodo&guardian&ign]