I must say, I don’t ask Siri to do enough for me. She sets countdowns and reminders and that’s about it. Thank God my sartorial questions can be resolved…

So if you want to try this out for yourself, summon Siri on your iPhone (sorry Android peeps) and ask, “Siri, what should I be this Halloween?”

According To TIME magazine, these are some of the responses that the digital assistant has been spitting out:

“You could dress up like chapstick and tell people you’re ‘the balm.’”

“Jump up and down, over and over, and shake your fist. You can tell people you’re antigravity.”

“Grab a pillow, some cardboard, and a brown t-shirt, and you’re a s’more. S’more or less.”

“Plankton.”

“Put on a little pointy hat, and go as a circumflex.”

“You could put on a surgical gown, hold some instruments, and tell people you’re an ‘operating system.’”

“You could go as an eclipse. Just dress in black and stand in front of things.”

“You could place a calendar on your head and go as an update.”

“Just be yourself, pumpkin.”

I tried it twice on my phone and Siri replied “Interesting question, Seth” both times.

Maybe that’s because Halloween is an American event which we have bizarrely embraced in South Africa? Maybe we should ask Siri why we suddenly celebrate Halloween in South Africa? Maybe we should ask why some of our mainstream radio presenters are faking American accents?

Maybe we should ask Siri why we can’t just be ourselves?

While we’re at it, will fees fall?

Will Zuma resign?

What is the endgame for Cape Town’s traffic problem?

Will everyone eventually drive a Vespa?

So many questions. So little time…