The state of traffic in Cape Town has grown exponentially infamous, as commuters sit everyday in back-to-back congestion to and from the CBD. Although the drive isn’t the worst experience, the time wasted can be exhausting – as a driver you have no room to do anything else. While half of me wants to go on a rant explaining how you are the traffic (if you take a moment to watch all the cars that surround you, 90% of them have just the driver) I won’t. Rather, I’m going to suggest ways to make your drive just that much more enjoyable.

Assert your dominance as dancing queen

Make a traffic jam a good one: Put together a mix of all your jams that make you, well, jam, onto a USB or whichever form your car will take. You know the one you pump before a night out, or that track you listen to before you have to do a presentation at work. Make a mix, play it loud and sing at your co-traffic sufferers. If they stare at you, make sure they know not to mess with your techniques and dance at them.

Remember this guy?

Get back at sales people

At some stage in our lives, we all get accosted by those sale people just trying to earn a buck. We get it, but my goodness it’s a frustrating ordeal to go through. But there’s a small way you can get them – or a form of them – back. You know those free numbers that companies just love to throw out? Turn the tables around: Call them back, put them on speaker (hands free, yo!) and have a chat. See how they feel.

99 bottles of rum

Yup, you read right. Instead of singing about bottles of beer, why not spice it up a bit. Kind of like a Twelve Days of Christmas remix, you can add a different kind of beverage every day. Right now I would suggest rum, because Spiced Red Heart Rum is on a mission to Flip The Script. It’s quite a catchy mixup, wouldn’t you say? You could try it with a pirate-esque ARRRRRR!, too.

Spiced Red Heart Rum Flipped the Script once again when Charlie nominated his best friend to get the spiced treatment. Every day, Sarah is one of those poor souls who has to brave the traffic of the M3, dealing with entitled soccer moms and brash Constantia businessmen. Roger Goode stopped her during her daily routine last Thursday and it is one commute she will never forget. You see, friends don’t let friends do the same thing over, and over, and over again, so nominate your friend to do something different.