The R3.2 Million Gift Bag That Oscar Nominees Receive

Well, well, well, looking into the Oscar’s goodie bag might show you more about whose hands are in whose pockets than anything else regarding the event. The gift bag – which is given to all nominees of the Oscars – will reportedly be worth around $200 000 and contains a very random selection of gifts that all have a hint of nepotism.

Lash Fary, the owner of Distinctive Assets, is known for the ultimate product placement as well as placing the best gifts together in one bag. Commenting on this year’s Oscars “Everyone Wins” gift bag, he says:

Once again a blend of fabulous, fun and functional items meant to thrill and pamper those who may have everything money can buy but still savour the simple joy of a gift.

Thrill indeed. The list of items includes vampire breast enhancement, a vape and a trip to Israel (how the heck did that get in there, I wonder).

Screen Shot 2016-02-09 at 11.07.53 AM

Here’s the full list:

10-day first-class trip to Israel: $55 000
15-day walking tour of Japan: $54 000
One year’s worth of unlimited Audi car rentals: $44 000
Lifetime supply of Lizora skincare: $30 000
Meal donation to a choice animal shelter or rescue: $6 200
Fit Club TV ‘Ultimate Fitness Package’: $6 200
Ultherapy, a laser skin-tightening procedure: $5 500
Steamist Total At Home Spa: $5 000
Grand Hotel Excelsior Vittoria: $5 000
Grand Hotel Tremezzo: $5 000
Golden Door Spa: $4 800
Delovery gift baskets: $2 000
Vampire Breast Lift: $1 800
Three private training sessions and a kitchen sweep with Jay Cardiello: $1 300
10 personal fitness sessions with Alexi Seletzky, celebrity trainer: $800
Sundial Powder Coating: $500
Belldini apparel: $300+
My M&M’s: $300
Joseph’s Toiletries toilet paper: $280
Nuelle Fiera Arouser For Her: $250
Tools by Gina salon product: $250
Haze Dual V3 Vaporiser: $250
Skin products from Healing Saint by Dr. Jane 360: $190
Lat & Lo jewellery: $159
Caolion skin care: $130
Tribute: $130
Zekkle Edge: $130
Sedona Lace makeup brushes: $110
Rougle Maple: $100
Mezcal El Silencio premium Mezcal: $70
Signature Vodka: $170
Phantom Glass screen protector: $60
Memobottle reusable bottle: $40
Greenhill Winery & Vineyards: $40
Cabernet sauvignon infused chocolates from Chocolatines: $35
Slimware: $30
Farm Wife Style handmade earrings: $25
Dandi Patch, underarm sweat patches: $21
Purely Inspired Organic Protein: $20
Hydroxycut Gummies: $20
Fabric care from Gleener on the Go: $12
Mission1 Clean Protein Bar: $5.60/box

Want more on that Vampire breast lift vibe? You asked for it:

Featured by Cosmopolitan, the new secret “must have” in Hollywood is the Vampire Breast Lift procedure which uses blood-derived growth factors to revive rounder cleavage without implants. Women can now also soften implant scars and irregularities (and restore sensation). Using technology used by plastic surgeons for years to help correct post-mastectomy scarring and to heal wounds, the Vampire Breast Lift procedure uses a woman’s own blood to improve appearance. Designed for zero downtime by Charles Runels, MD – the same physician who invented the Vampire Facelift.

And there’s something else for female nominees:

Female nominees will also receive a $250 “arouser” offering “gentle suction and stimulation”

Ooh la la. But how is this: Although the bag is called the “Everyone Wins” gift bag, it is only for nominees who are in high-end categories:

Notably, the bags are only given to nominees in the main acting and directing categories, assuring that the sponsored items will only be given to the most famous people at the ceremony. Don’t think for a second that anyone who spent their life savings on a nominated Best Documentary Short is going home with a $5,000 home spa system.

Imagine it was full of things that people actually wanted.

[source: theguardian&smh]

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