I honestly can’t tell if James Franco is the world’s biggest moron, or if he’s just so weird and intelligent that all the green he smokes just makes him crazy interesting.

Either way, I like it.

Franco has recently written a short story for Vice, titled ‘Bungalow 89’. It is indicated that the short story is fictional, but portrays many similar biographic details to a “character” named “Lindsay Lohan”.

“Bungalow 89” reads like a weird attempt at Faulkner-esque stream-of-consciousness, but also reads like an overlong explanation from Franco that he did not sleep with Lindsay Lohan, despite what her fuck lists may say. Apparently, while the two were guests at the Chateau Marmont, Lindsay would not stop trying to sleep with him.

In the short story, Franco wants to make it really clear that he didn’t sleep with this “fictional Hollywood girl”. He also wants to make it clear that even though this girl has the name “Lindsay Lohan”, it isn’t actually, in fact, Lindsay Lohan.

An excerpt from his “fictional” story:

I ran my fingers through her hair and thought about this girl sleeping on my chest, our fictional Hollywood girl, Lindsay. What will she do? I hope she gets better. You see, she is famous. She was famous because she was a talented child actress, and now she’s famous because she gets into trouble. She is damaged. For a while, after her high hellion days, she couldn’t get work because she couldn’t get insured. They thought she would run off the sets to party. Her career suffered, and she started getting arrested (stealing, DUIs, car accidents, other things). But the arrests, even as they added up, were never going to be an emotional bottom for her, because she got just as much attention for them as she used to get for her film performances. She would get money offers for her jailhouse memoirs, crazy offers. So how would she ever stop the craziness when the response to her work and the response to her life had converged into one? Two kinds of performance, in film and in life, had melted into one.

James Franco: high 90% of the time, all the time.

[source: Gawker]