The scientists examined the behaviour of customers in bars and nightclubs to see which behaviours were most successful at indicating to the barman the customer was ready to be served.

The tactic with the most success was standing squarely at the bar and looking directly at the bartender as they did their work. Basically, you have to eyeball the mofo.

Trying to squeeze in with a slanted shoulder will get you nowhere.

Don’t talk to your friends, and don’t look at the menu. Don’t gesture at the bartender, but do have money in your hand, or a wallet, at the very least. Essentially, you have to make it very clear that you know what you want to order, and you can make the transaction quickly.

This, from the Telegraph:

Dr Sebastian Loth, lead author of the study and a psychologist at Bielefeld University, said: “Effectively, the customers identify themselves as ordering and non-ordering people through their behaviour.

“Two signals are necessary and together form the sufficient set of signals for identifying the intention to place an order.

“First, the customers position themselves directly at the bar and, secondly, look at the bar/bartender.

“If one of these signals was absent, the participants judged the customers as not bidding for attention. This provided a clear indication that both signals are necessary for bidding for attention.”