Gupta Jet Removed And Someone Has Been Suspended – We’re surprised at how efficient the government has been with the dealing of the Gupta jet’s unauthorised visit to Waterkloof Air Force base. Someone has even been suspended – Chief of State Protocol, ambassador Bruce Koloane, to be exact. Nice of him to take one for the team. [news24]

Top TV Still Dry-Humping That Elusive Porn License – On Digital Media (ODM) which runs the struggling TopTV satellite pay-TV service in South Africa, will now have to register as a porn purveyor broadcasting sexually explicit content, says South Africa’s Film and Publication Board (FPB). [chanel24]

Remember That Spice Girls Musical That Just Launched? It’s Been Cancelled – Producers announced on Thursday that the Spice Girls musical will close at London’s Piccadilly Theatre on June 29 after a disappointing six-month run. Producer Judy Craymer said despite tweaks since the show opened in December, “we just can’t make it work.” Shit, really? [newsau]

It’s The Elgin Cool Wine And Country Festival This Saturday! – The Elgin Valley braces itself for the very first Elgin Cool Wine and Country Festival this Saturday. Less than an hour from Cape Town, the Elgin Valley is best known for fresh produce and cool climate wines. Get your tickets here for a day of fine wine, hearty food and live entertainment. [elginwine]

Facebook Release Earnings Figures – Facebook reported its quarterly earnings Wednesday. The company cleared $1.45 billion in revenue, 30% of which came from mobile advertising. Not bad. Not bad. [mashable]

Another Day, Another British Pedophile In The Headlines – Stuart Hall Admits Sex Assaults On Children – The CPS claims the broadcaster, 83, was an “opportunistic predator” and the star’s lawyer says “his disgrace is complete”. [skynews]

Say Goodbye To Hotmail. Say Goodbye My Baby – Like a citi Golf, most people in the world over the age of 30 will have owned a hotmail account at some stage of their lives. Well anyway, they’re gone now. No more Hotmail. Dead. [slashgear]

Jimmy Connors Hints At Chris Evert Abortion In New Book – They were the golden couple of tennis, champions on court and youthful sweethearts off it. But shortly before Jimmy Connors and Chris Evert were scheduled to tie the knot in the mid-1970s, the wedding was called off. [telegraph]

Old Pope Pulls In By Chopper To Say Howzit To New Pope – Former Pope Benedict has returned to the Vatican, two months after becoming the first pontiff to resign in 600 years. He was flown by helicopter from the Castel Gandolfo papal summer residence to live permanently in Vatican City. Can you imagine those two greeting? “Ahoy!” [bbc]

Fake Bomb Detector Conman Jailed For 10 Years – James McCormick, who sold more than £55m worth of fake detectors likely to have caused Iraqi deaths, jailed for 10 years. Howz this guy? [guardian]

Will One Messaging App Rule Them All? – today, the world sends more messages using chat apps than conventional SMS texts, according to a study by The Financial Times. [verge]

Iron Man 3 Is Breaking Necks And Cashing Cheques – The third installment in the hugely popular franchise opened in more than 40 countries last weekend and was the most popular movie in each and every one of them, earning a whopping $195.3 million in its first five days. [wired]

What’s Eating The Baby Boomers? – Suicide Rates Rise Sharply In U.S. – Suicide rates among middle-aged Americans have risen sharply in the past decade, prompting concern that a generation of baby boomers who have faced years of economic worry and easy access to prescription painkillers may be particularly vulnerable to self-inflicted harm. [newyorktimes]

25 Reasons To Love Mila Kunis – We don’t need to oversell Mila Kunis and explain why we included this story. It’s in the same vibe as Rachel Bilson. Those who know, know. And the rest, quite frankly, don’t matter. [buzzfeed]

Paris Jackson Has Cut Her Hair. WTF? – The DailyMail has some article about Michael Jackson’s daughter not wanting to go door-to-door selling Jehovah’s Witness books for her Grandmother (God, what a nightmare). But, more importantly, I see Paris has had a haircut? WTF? [dailymail]

Silk Road Targeted By Hackers – An “underground” website famed for selling drugs and other illegal items has been targeted in a cyberattack. [bbc]

How I Became A Hipster – After class, another 3rd Ward student asked me how the class went, so I told her “Well” and then added, “I’m thinking about turning my spare guest room into an abattoir.” She looked impressed. [newyorktimes]

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