Do you love burgers? Have you ever eaten a burger that you would pay R5 000 for? No? Read on, and you might find a meat sandwich to convince you otherwise.

 10.

Named after the Italian composer, Rossini, this burger is music to your mouth. Found in San Francisco, Las Vegas and Saint Louis, the Rossini is served in the Burger Bar restaurant chain. For just $60 (about R500) you can wrap your little mouth hole around Rossini’s Kobe beef patty, sauteed foie gras, shaved truffles and madeira sauce on an onion bun.

9.  

It’s not everyday we get a choice of what juicy buns we want with our meal. At Burger at Le Burger Brasserie buns are of much importance. Choose from the classic sesame seed, caramelized onion bun, aged parmesan cheese bun or oven-dried tomato ciabatta. And we haven’t even got to the filling of the beast. Throw together some Kobe beef, lobster, caramelized onions, brie and prosciutto, and you have yourself a mouthgasm. Let’s throw in some 100 year-old balsamic while we’re here. Fine with that. 

 $777 (about R6 000) gets you one of these big guys, with a bottle of Dom Pérignon from Le Burger Brassiere, Las Vegas.

8.

“If you hit the jackpot in Las Vegas, hands down, you have to pass by Fleur De Lys” Rich Kobe beef crowned with duck foie gras and black truffles make up the kernel of this delight. This burger, paired with 1990 Château Pétrus wine will set you back a messy $5 000 (about R45 000). But it’s worth it. I mean, you get a certificate and everything. Buyer’s remorse comes free.

7.

Burgerception. This feisty burger sports a beef patty stuffed with red wine-braised short ribs, foie gras, mix root vegetables and preserved black truffle, inside and on top. Served on a toasted parmesan and poppy seed bun for a fresh $120 (about R1 000), you would literally have to be missing your olfactory centre not to enjoy this burger.

6.

Take it all in, but only if you willing to drop $125 (about R1 000) for the Tri-Beef Burger by
The Old Homestead Steakhouse, Boca Raton. The tri in this big tasty doesn’t refer to the number of patties or cheeses, but rather the blend of three beefs used to make the succulent flippy. American Prime, Japanese Wagyu and Argentine beef are all nestled together to form this patty of patties. The world class beef burger comes with signature Chipotle ketchup, which includes the standard ingredients of truffle and champagne. $10 of every sale goes to the Make A Wish Foundation. Best charity work ever.

5.

Whats happening down under? For $160 (about R1 500) at the W Hotel in Korea, they’ll tell it’s the X Burger. Topped with foie gras and shaved black truffles on a set of brioche buns, the masterpiece also has space for grilled red onions, fresh asparagus, lobster tail and wild pine mushrooms. Want some sauce? You can choose between a selection of brunoise tomato salsa, dark red wine truffle sauce, and truffle aioli. Sexual.

4.

Trust New York to have a stunning burger stuffed with shrooms. The Richard Nouveau Burger ,which sells for a hefty $175 (about R1 600) can be found at the Wall Street Burger Shoppe. You know a place means business if it has extra letters in the name. If you can’t see from the picture, you should know that these buns are filled with a whole lot of tantalizing goodness. What kind of goodness? The kind of goodness that comes from Kobe beef, foie gras, exotic mushrooms, cave-aged Gruyère, and fresh truffles packed in a brioche bun. And the pièce de résistance is a topping of gold mayo. Real gold.

3.

This $186 (about R1 750) fast food whopper from West London is made with Wagyu beef, stacked white truffles, onion tempura prepared in Cristal champagne and some of Spain’s finest Pata Negra proscuitto. But wait, there’s more! We can’t leave out the gorgeous Iranian saffron and truffle buns that keep all this stuffing together. This is one big guy I’d love to run into.

2.

Let’s just call this one provocative. For $295 (about R2 700), it sure has to be.

This Le Burger Extravagant can be found at Serendipity 3. The Waygu beef patty is infused with 10-herb white truffle butter and seasoned with smoked sea salt. And for those of you who like it cheesey, there is the optional extra of 18 month matured cheddar by famed cheesemaker, James Montgomery. Just for a change the expensive burger is completed with truffles, not to mention a fried quail egg, blini, creme fraiche, and Kaluga caviar on a white truffle-buttered Campagna roll.

If you aren’t sold, you also get a solid gold toothpick, encrusted with diamonds to clean the meat out of your teeth. So blessed.

1.

This New Yorker is filled with Kobe patty,  gruyere cheese melted with champagne steam, lobster, truffles, caviar, BBQ sauce made with Kopi Luwak coffee beans, and hits the floor at a staggering $666 (about R6 000), hence its name, The Douche.

“It consists of a fucking burger filled and topped with rich people shit.”

Couldn’t have put it better myself. We all have a weakness for a douche, so if you have $666 and a strong heart, what are you waiting for, HUH?

This post was brought to you by Cafe Caprice.

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