In what is possibly the funniest story of the year, it has been alleged that the man known as the Blade Runner, has threatened to break the legs of former soccer player and Supersport presenter, Marc Batchelor. Mah boet.

It doesn’t end there. No. The man alleged to have sparked it all, is the creator of Clifton Shores, Quinton van der Burgh. Van der Burgh is also a businessman with a finger in many pies, and he is said to have committed infidelity with Pistorius’ 18-year-old, unnamed, “girlfriend”, while Pistorius was away in London competing in the Olympics.

It all started in a VIP room (because that’s how these ou’s roll) at the Kyalami racetrack soon after Pistorius returned from the Olympics.

“Enraged by jealousy,” the story goes that Pistorius approached Van der Burgh and swore at him about his relationship with the woman.

But because Van der Burgh was in the company of “numerous businessmen who invest in his companies,” he “was embarrassed by what happened.”

Van der Burgh then laid a charge of intimidation against Pistorius, and that’s when Pistorius began to flex his texting muscles, and sent Van der Burgh a barrage of threatening text messages, and not BBM’s with angry face emoticons.

That’s when Batchelor, friends with Brett Kebble murderer Mikey Schultz, and a former Orlando Pirates, Kaizer Chiefs and Moroka Swallows star who lost his job at Supersport a few years ago for getting involved in fights, got involved – he wanted to defend his friend, Van der Burgh, and the two men exchanged threats via SMS during which Pistorius is alleged to have told Batchelor he would break his legs.

Mah boet.

In turn, a charge of intimidation was laid against Batchelor after he allegedly threatened Pistorius in return. Though it’s not clear if he alleged to hide Pistorius’ blades or not.

The Hawks sat Pistorius and Batchelor down on Tuesday to discuss the matter, and apparently everyone was so blown away by the presence of the Blade Runner, that he had to remain behind for some time afterwards to sign autographs.

All three would have preferred this to remain out of the press, but it hasn’t, and they had this to say:

Said Batchelor, about the charges:

No, there’s nothing like that. I had a meeting, that’s all. I don’t even know the oke. I met him for the first time today.

Said Pistorius:

This is not something I want to talk about.

Said Van der Burgh, who was scared for his life:

I deal with big projects so I need to keep a low profile. This is not his girlfriend, let’s get that right.

Mah boet.

[Source: IOL]