In an attempt to recreate Willy Wonka’s famous “Golden Ticket”, Nestle has launched a new, not-dodgy-at-all, marketing campaign. They will be “stalking” six “lucky” customers using GPS-trackers that have been embedded in selected chocolate bars.

As is the case with most powerful creations, technology can either be used for good or evil…or that weird place in-between the two that is home to all things awkward, creepy, weird and just generally cringe inducing. Nestle has managed to secure themselves a spot in the latter.

Its new “We Will Find You” campaign aims to bring joy by tracking customers and then spontaneously giving them £10 000. Sounds pretty grand, right? It is, but it’s also well creepy.

In brief, it works as follows: Nestle has embedded six chocolate bars with GPS-trackers, these will be activated once the wrapper is torn. Once activated a signal is sent out to a Nestle team who will find you, wherever you are, within 24 hours, and deliver the cash. Not creepy at all. Let’s take a closer look at the thinly-veiled, corporate stalking.

First off, the campaign slogan, “We Will Find You” is more than slightly concerning. It’s tongue-in-cheek, no doubt, but it comes off a bit strong and is reminiscent of something that Liam Neeson’s Taken character, Mills, would say, or even something that Buffalo Bill would leave on the answering machine of his next victim. Why not keep it lighthearted and punt the actual prize rather than stoke the ire of conspiracy theorists everywhere (I know, I know, the point of the campaign is that they’re using GPS).

Moving swiftly along, and at risk of sounding like a deranged conspiracy theorist, although Nestle claims that only six chocolate bars have been embedded with GPS-trackers, what’s to say that it’s not more? Yes, it probably would be expensive, but amount of consumer data/habits that would be generated would be enough to get any manufacturer/distributor/marketing agency frothing, and they’d happily fork out the cash.

The tracker is (apparently) only enabled once the wrapper is broken which would give considerable insights to choccie-munching habits; what time most people devour their daily delight(s), where they do so, who litters, and so on.

The finding you part is also slightly unsettling. Will tact be exercised? What if you’re midway through a post-curry bathroom visit, or they happen to catch you on the one day you decided to visit gentlemen’s club? Are they coming with a media team to record the happy moment and instantly upload it to the world wide interweb? Concerns abound!

I’m more of an armchair/amateur theorist but I have no doubt that somewhere there is someone who will kick up a fuss about privacy concerns and how this violates something that they care about dearly and will set them off into a week-long tutting marathon.

What do you make of all this? Creepy, yay or nay? What’s your privacy worth? Let us know in the comments.

Oh, and here’s an ad spot promoting the new campaign:

[Source: Network World, PSFK]