Yes.

It’s allowed. Men can write about shoes too.

You’ll be relieved to hear that I only have a manly four pairs: a mandatory pair of tough leather brogues, a pair of comfortable loafers, high-tops, and for excess, a pair of brown sneakers.

I understand most chaps get by with one pair of church shoes, a set of golfing shoes and slops. Which is fine. Years ago, Schalk Burger – how happy was I to see him go down those steps to accept his Bok cap for the World Cup – was in Sport Illustrated, showing off his remarkably tasteless house and his two pairs of shoes. Extravagance is never pretty. I knew a guy who had dozens of pairs of shoes. He grew up and became an investment banker. Let that be a lesson to us all.

But that is also no excuse for being slovenly when it comes to shoes. Since the shoes go on the feet, it’s easy to ignore them. To think you can get by with a good shirt and jacket while leaving your shoes to the mercy of poor taste is not ok. I suspect this is why Gregory House said that shoes never lie.

Which is why I take such careful consideration when buying new shoes. The nice thing about men’s apparels is that it lasts forever. A female fashion designer I know very well told me so. Women’s clothes aren’t made to last. Men’s are, she said.

Which brings me nicely to my point: I have a beautiful pair of leather loafers that I bought in early 2008. They’re my perfect style – not too formal, not too flashy, not looking like they belong on the feet of a jazz trumpeter or a Nigerian drug dealer. In a word, elegant.

But they’re old now. They’ve trodden through three years of KwaZulu Natal grassland, sticky floors in seedy Ballito nightclubs and bars (and in Johannesburg too), and now should have the dignified end that always awaited them. Except that they can’t. Like Roberto Carlos or certain rugby players, they are still here, long after their prime. My excuse (as opposed to Roberto Carlos) is that I can’t replace them. God knows I’ve tried.

The particular pair that I bought in ’08 is quite tapered in the front. I bought them in Woolworths, and quite predictably, Woolies doesn’t stock them anymore. Instead, they have very flat-fronted shoes which I don’t like at all. I’ve tried different stores in different malls, and even the extremely expensive ones don’t stock the exact type of shoe that I’m looking for.

If anyone out there knows someone who sells shoes like the ones above, do let me know. I’m quite desperate, though I say so myself.

We know all about the Johannesburg vs Cape Town vs Durban wars – I can confidently say that Durban wins when it comes to stocking shoes for the discerning man. The choice up here in Johannesburg is simply appalling, and I remember Cape Town to cater exclusively for skater boys.

Durban has good shoes.