We all have our lapses of judgment. But some of us make such horrendously poor decisions that one simply has to ask, “What were they on?”. Every week we bring you three contenders in what can only be described as a battle of small wits. So, with great pleasure we present this week’s three La Fee Absinthe-Minded Moment of the Week finalists. Inside we have the South African Department of Labour, dog shaman James Lech, and Marnus Steyl. But who claims the prize for the most mindbogglingly foolish tomfoolery of the week? Click through to find out!

Third place – James Lech

James Lech, the dog whisperer that has featured amongst the news this week after it emerged that his “rehabilitated” Rottweiler mauled a 4-year-old girl in a Jozi mall, has yet to apologise for the incident. James chose to state that he saw the little girl stand on the dog and thus she had caused the vicious attack herself. Unfortunately for James, clear video surveillance evidence that was leaked on YouTube shows a completely different side of the story. James, you’re not doing the right thing here and clearly dog whispering with absinthe-laden breath doesn’t work.

Second place – Marnus Steyl

A syndicate that has been obtaining rhino hunting permits under false pretences has been unearthed by Media 24’s investigative journalists. Basically, Marnus Steyl, a 37-year-old South African lion breeder and safari operator, is alleged to be the international syndicate’s key supplier of horn to the East. How? By recruiting Thai prostitutes and strippers from clubs in Pretoria and Midrand to pose as “hunters”, whom South African law legally allows to shoot one rhino per year, in sham rhino trophy hunts. These “legally” acquired rhino horn trophies, bought at R65 000 per kilogram, and eventually sold for up to $35 000 per kilogram, would be shipped from South Africa to south-east Asia. Absinthe to help with the guilt, Marnus?

The winner – the South African Department of Labour

We’re not lawyers here at 2oceansVibe, but we are logical. Generally, the law is logical too. So, by applying the logic that a convicted criminal shouldn’t have their taxpayer-funded salary reinstated, whether they’re appealing their court judgement or not, I think we’d all be on the same page here. Sadly, this is not the case, and logic thus says there must be a rather large amount of absinthe consumption happening in the South African Department of Labour. Hopefully, this will wake them from their binge and this won’t be allowed to happen again. Shots of absinthe for everyone! Thanks, Sheryl.