A car launch is a wonderful thing, and I do my utmost to appreciate every aspect of it. The flights, the airport lounges, the car itself, the expensive hotel, the expensive food, and then all of that repeated on day two.

And every now and then a manufacturer will just fire the accountant and go nuts. Which, I imagine, is exactly what I’ve just experienced on the national launch of the BMW 6-Series Convertible.

This is a car that costs nearly R1.2million. It’s large, powerful, exclusive, and tends to be purchased by those in their silver-haired years, or those doing their best to pretend that they aren’t. Even the power point slides featured images of classy dames in beige scarves throwing their hair back and cackling at the sky.

And thus BMW treated us scraggy journos (well, that’s me anyway) to two days of living like the aforementioned individuals. If you are not even remotely interested in motor vehicles, or how they work, please skip a few paragraphs now, to the section about the hotel. I’m about to explain why the new 650i is such a magnificent piece of machinery.

Being a 650i, you might assume that the engine size is 5.0 litres. But you’d be wrong. In a world gone mad over consumption, BMW has chosen to reduce the size of the engine and add turbos. Two, exactly, but this is no bad thing. The new engines are dramatically more powerful and use less fuel, which in biological terms is like creating a teenager who is academically and socially way ahead of his peers but requires no financial input.

300kW is available for you to scare your lucky passenger to death, while blasting past slow moving traffic  and generally breaking every speed limit imaginable, without even trying. The way this car accelerates from 120km/h is just frightening; a kick in the back is complimented by your head hitting the head rest and the scenery going a bit blurry. Its bloody fantastic.

Make no mistake, this is a big, powerful Gran Tourer, with all the mod cons you could ever hope to have in a vehicle, with acres of perfectly stitched leather all round. I particularly like the heads up display, which projects the speed limit (in a cute little white and red circle), your current speed and the next instruction from the SatNav onto the windscreen in your line of sight. You might imagine this is distracting, but after about 10 seconds it becomes so natural, you begin to wonder why every car doesn’t feature this. Soon, I expect, they will.

BMW’s suspension engineers are either geniuses or practice black magic. As far as I can tell, they are the only manufacturer that can truly make these big, fat, modern sports cars handle like nimble little coupes half their size. It’s something I truly appreciate about the marque, and something which I imagine most other manufacturers have been trying (with varying degrees of success) to copy.

The styling, I feel, is a bit strained. It looks like they’ve had to really bend the rules a bit to make styling cues from other cars in the BMW stable fit this car. It doesn’t work from every angle, but it is very striking, and certainly looks like nothing else on the road. It almost looks like it’s from another planet.

If you’re here to hear about the hotel, you may now stop skimming and carry on reading. The hotel we lazy ungrateful journos were treated to was the new Manor House at the iconic Fancourt. It is quite simply one of the most remarkable places I have ever had the priviledge of resting my head.

The suites are generous in every way. A butler, one of the many who work 24/7, will somehow find you and walk you to your room. You are immediately greeted by a Lavazza espresso machine, crystal decanters filled with good spirits, and a full bar fridge, all complimentary. Well hello.

The enormous mirror in the lounge is actually a television and the enormous bed is concealed behind enormous sliding wooden doors which are backed by enormous mirrors. The frankly gargantuan bed is only outdone by the cavernous bathroom, which is so stylishly appointed I almost felt rude setting foot in there.

The complimentary fruit platter, a glass of sherry and the remote for the ipod dock accompanied me to a hot relaxing bath, followed by a spectacular dinner in the restaurant which was named after some old guy.

A few well-aged whiskies in the cigar bar rounded off the evening and I promptly passed out the moment my head hit the oversized pillow.

I hope after wading through the above regurgitation of my last 48 hours, you don’t hate me. All I’m trying to achieve here is provide a view into these weird and extraordinary things called car launches, which, by some odd twist of fate, I am fortunate to attend. And trust me, they were better before the recession. BMW once chartered the Concorde for an exclusive flight between Joburg and Cape Town, taking journos on what must have been the most memorable thrill ride of all time.

And lastly, if you have over R1.1million to spend on a car, and therefore the means to stay in a hotel like the Manor House, I wholeheartedly suggest both.

Ciro De Siena – OverdriveTV