Thursday, April 17, 2025

January 25, 2011

Oprah Unveils Half Of Another Woman As Her Sister

Oprah Winfrey had all of America giddy yesterday when she finally revealed the “miracle of miracles” she’s been hyping for a while now. The big woo ha? She has a half-sister the same full size as herself. Named Patricia for now, Oprah’s half-sis hails from Milwaukee and loves the media mogul’s new network launched recently. Publicity stunt with a p, right?

Oprah Winfrey had all of America giddy yesterday when she finally revealed the “miracle of miracles” she’s been hyping for a while now. The big woo ha? She has a half-sister the same full size as herself. Named Patricia for now, Oprah’s half-sis hails from Milwaukee and loves the media mogul’s new network launched recently. Publicity stunt with a p, right?

Oprah probably had this one lined up years ago. It’s not bad. A lost sibling  dug up after being adopted in 1963. A loaded reunion televised to millions. For once it’s not Oprah reuniting two strangers, but Oprah herself embracing a long lost loved one. Who writes this crap?

Obviously Oprah’s fans – that include half of humanity – ate this up without thinking. They’ve already been through the roller coaster of learning their favourite talk show host lost a child at age 14 and was molested so a new sibling was never going to be much of a stretch.

They ate it up and it’s working.

Not only are Oprah’s ratings shooting through the roof, it puts the Queen of All Media exactly where she wants to be: in pole position to take over the world. After that, who knows? Probably Oprah on the bridge of her star ship yelling in her trademark monotone, “Let’s take over some galaxieeeees!”

[Source: Guardian]