Paris Hilton Does Community Service In Heels – They were given strict instructions on what to wear and told ‘expect to get dirty’. But while Paris Hilton diligently donned the regulation T-shirt and suggested trousers for her community service, she just couldn’t do without her high heels. The heiress wore four-inch stiletto heels to complete her court-ordered work with the Hollywood Beautification Team. [dailymail]

Beatles Sell 2M iTunes And 450K Albums In A Week – When Apple Inc. announced last week that the Beatles’ catalog would at long last be available for legal downloading on iTunes, many skeptics groused that the two entities had come together too late: Everyone who cares about the group’s music long ago found a way to store it on their PCs, laptops or MP3 players.Apparently not. [latimes]

William And Kate Save The Date – Prince William and Kate Middleton will marry on Friday 29 April at Westminster Abbey, Clarence House has announced. The couple, both 28, got engaged while on holiday in Kenya in October. Prime Minister David Cameron said it would be “a happy and momentous occasion” and would be marked by a public holiday. Indeed. [bbc]

The Cycling Mafia Strikes Again – The cycling mafia strikes again Every time they take over a city, the residents complain. And every time, cyclists respond with bluster, swearing or worse. Here’s why races that require road closures should be banned. [thedailymaverick]

Hard-Up SABC Staff’s R10M Bonuses – The cash-strapped SABC is to fork out almost R10-million in retention bonuses for 172 employees in the next two years, despite admitting that some of them lack the skills needed to turn the public broadcaster around. SABC executives reported yesterday to parliament’s communications committee on their plans to return the broadcaster to profitability after reporting a deficit of R950-million last year. [timeslive]

The Pope Reckons Women As Well As Men Can Use Condoms – The clarification, the latest step in what is already seen as a significant shift in the Catholic Church policy, came at a news conference presenting the pope’s new book: “Light of the World: The Pope, the Church, and the Sign of the Times”. In the book, a long interview with German Catholic journalist Peter Seewald, the Pope used the example that a male prostitute would be justified using a condom to avoid transmitting the killer disease. [telegraph]

Charlie Sheen Sues Porn Star – Charlie Sheen filed a lawsuit Monday for extortion and two other counts against the porn star who claims he tried to choke her during a bizarre meltdown in a New York hotel last month. In the lawsuit, Sheen alleges that Christina Walsh, aka Capri Anderson, demanded $1 million from the Two and a Half Men star to keep quiet. The suit also alleges that Walsh works as a prostitute. [radar]

Dogs Are Smarter Than Cats – Scientists at Oxford University claim canines are smarter than felines. And the reason, according to the researchers, is that dogs are more social animals and, therefore, have bigger brains. The study, published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, charted the evolutionary history of various mammals’ brains over 60 million years and found a link between the size of an animal’s brain in relation to its body and how socially active it was. [nypost]

Watch: Lost Michael Jackson Video – A previously unreleased Michael Jackson video for his 2003 song “One More Chance” was posted on the singer’s site Friday.The R. Kelly-penned song was released as a single late that year and was featured on Jackson’s Number Ones LP. The video is apparently unconnected to Michael, the album of previously unreleased material, out December 14. [rollingstone]

The Biggest Richest Party Ever – A London-based group of hedge-fund managers is planning The Global Party, a 24-hour blow-out for 80,000 of their closest friends on Sept 15, 2011.The aim is to make it into the Guinness Book of World Records as the largest party ever. It has already been coined the ‘biggest, richest party ever’. [luxuo]

Kim Jong Il Visits Soy Sauce Factory – With his country on the brink of war, North Korean leader Kim Jong Il spent today reinforcing stereotypes about his own eccentricity: He took his youngest son and heir apparent on a tour of a soy sauce factory.That’s according to a report by North Korea’s state news agency, excerpted by the south’s Yonhap service. Why, you ask? Because that’s how he rolls! [aolnews]

Bishop Suspended Following Royal Comments – Shame, this guys week has just gone from bad to shit. First he condemns the marriage of Prince William and Kate Middleton. Then he is forced to make a public apology and now it seems it’s all a bit late, as he finds himself suspended from duty. I think our boy will think twice the next time he logs on to Facebook. [guardian]

Facebook Tries To Silence Lamebook – Another chapter in the Facebook vs. Lamebook, errmm, book: the social networking giant has confirmed that it has moved to diligently block all outgoing links to Lamebook.com, shut down the two-person company’s Facebook Page (previously at facebook.com/thelamebook), and blocks visitors of the funny site from ‘liking’ posts to boot. Face deems Lame’s activities under an “improper attempt to build a brand that trades off Facebook’s popularity and fame.” [techcrunch]

Skype Hits New Record – With an IPO looming, Skype is touting a major new milestone: 25 million concurrent users. The number was reached on Monday for the first time, and the company says it represents a new all-time high.To put that in some perspective, Verizon Wireless, the largest mobile carrier in the U.S., serves a little more than 100 million customers. [mashable]

Facebook To Register The Word ‘Face’ – A short time ago, Facebook took over the trademark application for “Face” from a company who operated a site called Faceparty.com. This particular application was opposed by Aaron Greenspan—the fellow who took Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg to court over the creation of Facebook—but now has been granted a Notice of Allowance by the USPTO anyway. [gizmodo]

Pro-Google Vigilante Squad Terrorizes Germans – German reactionaries have a bizarre new icon: Google. Vandals in the Bergerhausen area of western Germany have egged several houses for opting out of Google Street View, leaving behind notes reading, “Google’s cool.” Get the message, privacy-hoarding squares? All of the victims in the Saturday night attacks elected to have their row houses blurred on Street View, joining about 3 percent of German households who have done likewise. [valleywag]

Top US Comic Debuts One Man Show In SA – South Africa is first in line to see the World Debut of stand-up comic & star of that TV show “TITUS”, Christopher Titus’ “Neverlution”. Described as “Most original comic voice since ‘Seinfeld’”- Newsdaily. Time Magazine called Titus “brutal, hilarious and audacious” Be the first audience in the world to see his new show. [neverlution]

live – every day – 1-click to tune in..