No Makeup : Jessica Simpson for U.S. Marie Claire

Jessica Simpson Does Marie Claire With No Makeup – Jess hits the cover of the May issue of Marie Claire (US) sans makeup. “I don’t have anything to prove anymore. What other people think of me is not my business,” she reckons. Adding, “I’ll usually wash my hair and let it air-dry wavy, but if I’m just in a hang-out mood, I won’t even wash it. I’ll wait until it smells.” Wow! That may well be a little more info than I was looking for. More pics. [marieclaire]

Poland Mourns a Plane Crash That Decimates Its Government – Poland has launched a week of national mourning, following the devastating plane crash in Russia that killed Polish President Lech Kaczynski and his wife as well as several other top-ranking officials. Ninety-six passengers were killed after the aged Russian aircraft, a Tupolev Tu-154, plunged into a forest near the airport in the Russian city of Smolensk. [time]

Man Promises To Arrest Pope – Richard Dawkins, the atheist campaigner, is planning a legal ambush to have the Pope arrested during his state visit to Britain “for crimes against humanity”. Dawkins and Christopher Hitchens, the atheist author, have asked human rights lawyers to produce a case for charging Pope Benedict XVI over his alleged cover-up of sexual abuse in the Catholic church. [timesuk]

Phil Mickelson Wins Third Masters – Even sweeter than Phil Mickelson slipping into another green jacket was seeing his wife waiting for him behind the 18th green at Augusta National with tears streaming down her face. Amy Mickelson, with her long blonde hair and easy smile, had not been at a tournament since she was diagnosed with breast cancer 11 months ago. It’s also quite cool that her husband hasn’t boned half of America. [msn]

Apple Gets Ruthless With Rivals – Apple’s battle with Adobe intensified last week when Apple changed its terms and conditions for iPhone developers to exclude apps not written in native code. The change, announced as Apple released the fourth version of its iPhone operating system, means that apps written using Adobe’s Flash Professional CD5 software – released next week – will probably not be accepted for the iPhone. [telegraph]

Ferrari Unveils The New 599 GTO – Ferrari have released the Ferrari 599 GTO their fastest road car ever based on the 599 GTB Fiorano. The 599 GTO takes its name from the legendary 250 GTO made in the early 1960’s and the GTO stands for Gran Turismo Omologato. The car is powered by the same six liter V12 engine as the 599 GTB but output has been increased to six hundred and sixty one horsepower. [luxuo]

Tiger Woods Outburst Caught On Tape – Tiger Woods vowed that when he returned to golf, he would treat the game with the utmost respect and would cut down on verbally displaying his frustration at times. Well, in the third round of the Masters on Saturday, he got a little sloppy on the sixth hole. After hitting his first shot on the par three he let himself know that he sucks by saying, “Tiger Woods, you suck.” He followed that up by letting out a very Buddhist, “Goddamnit.” [totalprosports]

Jim Carrey: Tiger Woods’ Wife ‘Was Ignoring the Obvious’ – Jim Carrey is tweeting more of his candid thoughts about the Tiger Woods sex scandal, one day after suggesting that Woods’ wife Elin Nordegren must have known the golf great was having affairs.”Tiger was wrong and Elin was ignoring the obvious,” Carrey tweeted Saturday morning, responding to a fellow Twitter user who’d commented on his post from the previous day. [theinsider]

KFC Launches The “Double-Down” Burger, Which May Well Kill You – As a way to address the no-carb trend the world finds itself in, KFC have introduced a “bunless” burger. ie. a burger with no bread. How do they do this? Easy, bacon and cheese on the inside and two fried chicken breasts on the outside. It’s got more calories and fat grams than a McDonald’s Big Mac. [qsrweb]

How VISA Predicts Divorce – By scrutinizing your purchases, credit companies try to figure out if your life is about to change—so they’ll know what to sell you. If you ever doubted the power of the credit card companies, consider this: Visa, the world’s largest credit card network, can predict how likely you are to get a divorce. There’s no consumer-protection legislation for that. [dailybeast]

We Have A Basic Human Right To Drink Beer – Staff at the beer company Carlsberg are striking over a dispute over how much beer they can drink while on duty. Workers were previously allowed to drink at work but are now restricted to one beer at lunch. Homer Simpson would give his full support to this kind of initiative. [bbc]

Self Destructive Geniuses – LIFE.com puts together a wonderful pictorial of famous literary drunks and addicts. From Capote to Hemingway, these guys & gals indulged in everything from booze, speed and weed, to absinthe, opium, heroin and cocaine. Needless to say Hunter S. Thompson does appear. His list of narcotics is given simply as “everything” and his quote reads, “I wouldn’t recommend sex, drugs, or insanity for everyone, but they’ve always worked for me.” [life]

Elephant Kills Trainer At Pennsylvania Circus – Tragedy struck at a Pennsylvania circus Friday after a startled elephant stomped its trainer to death, police said. People at the Irem Shrine in Wilkes-Barre, which has been hosting the James Hamid Circus all week, rushed to help but not before the trainer sustained life-threatening injuries, said police Lt. Steven Oshefski. Good. [cnn]

Sophie Monk In Bikini On Vacation In Mexico – I get the message here. Sophie wants me to take a whole stack of Cuervo Gold tequila and meet her in Mexico. She wants us to do shots all day and for me to wear an extra big sombrero that we can “consiga ocupado” underneath it. That means “get busy” to those of you who don’t speak several languages. [gotceleb]

[thanks jack]