Tiger Woods Faces First Interview On ESPN – Tiger Woods has finally given the world what they wanted. A close-up tightly shot question time with ESPN, where he had to face questions about why he did it, as well as what he thinks his father would have said to him, had he still been alive to witness Tiger’s monumental fuck-express tour of the United States over the past few years. [espn]

Are The Daily Malema News Reports Really News? – Should the daily front page stories about Julius Malema and the silly things he says not be turned into some kind of a weekly comic book? Then people could go to that comic book to keep up to date on Julius Malema and how he thinks I’m a cock and how petrified everyone is if he becomes president and how many chicks Zuma has banged. Look, that stuff needs to be reported, but where do we go if we want the other stuff we really care about. Oh – we’re right here! [mail&guardian]

Google Pulls Out Of China – Google’s China domain, Google.cn, now redirects to Google.com.hk. The new site reads, “Welcome to the new home of Google China search.” The switch means Google is no longer censoring search results for its Chinese visitors. Whether Chinese Internet can actually access Google.com.hk is another matter. It may be blocked by the Chinese government. [businessinsider]

Simon Cowell’s Ex-girlfriends Planning His Nuptials – Simon Cowell is known to be good pals with many of his former flames, and the music mogul is apparently making good use of his friendly relations.The 50-year-old’s ex-girlfriends, Sinitta and Jackie are reportedly helping to plan Simon’s wedding to fiancée Mezhgan Hussainy. I just love the way this guy operates. Can you imagine our local Idols Cowell-pretender coming remotely close to being this cool? [hellomagazine]

Surgeon Creates Implant-Free Boob Job – A British cosmetic surgeon has devised a new kind of boob job that replaces silicon with the woman’s own breast tissue. The procedure simply moves some tissue from underneath the breast above the nipple, tightening the skin below, pulling the breast up, and filling it out. God, it’s so obvious! They should open up a service doing this on Camps Bay beach – next to the massage tent. [telegraph]

Landmark Health Care Bill Finally Arrives On Obama’s Desk – President Obama will sign sweeping health care reform legislation into law at the White House on Tuesday, according to two Democratic officials familiar with the planning. The bill, which constitutes the biggest expansion of federal health care guarantees in over four decades, passed the House of Representatives late Sunday night. It was approved by the Senate in December. [cnn]

Teen Girls’ Latest Craze: The ‘Haul’ Video – The newest viral craze sweeping YouTube is the “haul video,” which works like this: A young woman goes on a shopping spree, returns home, turns on her webcam and…shows the world her haul. The products are usually fairly democratic, from chain stores like Target and Abercrombie, which could explain the videos’ appeal. “The majority of teenagers can’t afford to imitate Blair Waldorf from Gossip Girl …” [newser]

Sasha Baron Choen Gets Married – Mazeltov! – Isla Fisher (quite hot) has married her long-term fiancé, comedian Sacha Baron Cohen, in a romantic sunset ceremony in Paris. The notoriously private couple invited just a few close relatives to witness them become husband and wife in a traditional Jewish ceremony last Monday. “We did it – we’re married!” bubbled an ecstatic Isla, 34, in an email to friends around the world the following day. I also got one of those, but I don’t think we were meant to talk to the press. [msn]

You Can Text Me Now – Most of us now carry cell phones that can do a lot more than make phone calls—we can send text messages, check our e-mail, surf the Web, and generally lose ourselves in the depths of a 3.5-inch screen. But look around you. Many people are pulling out their phones at inappropriate times. Here is the one simple rule you need to know to have perfect texting etiquette. And hey, I didn’t write it! [slate]

Sandra Bullock’s Husband’s Mistress Is A White Supremacist – This whole thing is gonna get messy. ‘Cos if you think that Jennifer Arniston was America’s sweetheart after Jolie took Brad from her, just wait until you check this homewrecker out. It was one thing for Bullock’s fans to deal with the fact that her hubby, Jesse James (shame) cheated on her. But it’s another whole vibe when you find out that the whore who caused Sandra such pain, has “White Power” tattooed on her legs. Filthy slut. [radar]

‘Choose Your Own Adventure’ Comes To Twitter – As if Twitter weren’t enough of a time-sink, Jonah Peretti of Buzzfeed and Huffington Post fame created a choose your own adventure game using only Twitter (and lots of Bit.ly links.) In case you aren’t familiar with choose your own adventure games, it’s basically a written work that allows the reader to make choices that affect the storyline, creating a tree-shaped narrative structure. I tried it. I died. [mashable]

Mila Kunis Poses For GQ Magazine – If you don’t know who she is, I will remind you that she is in fact the hottie from the movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall. I know – you quite liked her didn’t you? You what? You haven’t seen the movie? Well that’s pretty emboerrissing! Best you get that done ASAP my little friend. We prefer you to be on the ball when it comes to these things. Check out these pics and you’ll see why. [hollywoodtuna]

Top 50 Names For Rich People’s Babies – Charlotte, Seraphina, Henry and Finn are baby names too cool for the most popular lists. Looking for the perfect name for your firstborn, you practically earn a degree in actuarial science studying the Social Security most popular names list. Of course you wouldn’t choose a ubiquitous name like Emily or Jacob, but you’re also determined to suss out those names that are rising too fast through the ranks: Lila and Luca, Peyton, Jack and Pax. [dailybeast]

Häkkinen vs. Schumacher: The Greatest Overtaking In Formula One – Much is written about the dwindling of overtaking in modern Formula One. Don’t tell Mika Häkkinen, who in 2000, performed the greatest modern undertaking move on a momentarily hapless Michael Schumacher. It was a late August day in 2000 at the Belgian Grand Prix and reigning champion Häkkinen of McLaren was chasing Michael Schumacher to retake his lead. [jalopnik]