The Trailer For The New A-Team Movie Is Shit – I don’t quite no what else to say. It just doesn’t pack a punch. It’s so badly edited and the voice-over guy sounds like he is about to fall asleep. Oh, if you’re expecting to see ex-District 9‘s Sharlto Copley, the South African playing Howling Mad Murdoch in the movie, enjoy the split second that he appears. [traileraddict]

Tiger Woods Hiding At Exclusive Rehab in Cape Town – Local and international media are quite slow on the uptake, as reports are only now gaining momentum regarding Tiger Woods and his possible sex addiction treatment at the exclusive Montrose Place Luxury Rehab facility in Bishopscourt, Cape Town. Remember, you heard it here first! [iafrica]

Shark Attack Report With Swear Words At Fish Hoek – Besides the fact that News24 awesomely quote a Twitter user as saying, “Holy shit, we just saw a GIGANTIC shark,” it seems The NSRI is investigating reports of a fatal shark attack at Fish Hoek beach near Cape Town. And goodness, PLEASE don’t tell Virgin Active about that swearing! [news24]

Google To Pull Out Of China Following Cyber Attacks – Responding to a highly sophisticated cyberattack on opponents of the Chinese government, Google said Tuesday that it is no longer willing to operate a government-censored search engine in China — and may shut down its Chinese operations altogether. Jackie Chan could not be reached for comment. [mercury]

Tony Blair For Louis Vuitton? – IN THE heat of campaign season, is it possible that Tony Blair is set to follow in Madonna’s footsteps as the face of the luxury label? In fact he is set to undertake a role more suited to his skills and experience – as an advisor at the luxury conglomerate owned by his friend Bernard Arnault; LVMH. [vogue]

Jay Leno Show Gets Canceled, As Jay Leno Slams NBC – In his first show since NBC announced they were pulling the plug on the 10:00 p.m. “Jay Leno Show,” and moving him back to his former 11:35 p.m. slot, Leno didn’t hold back. He ended his monologue with one last insult. “I take pride in one thing. I leave NBC prime time the same way I found it — a complete disaster.” [huffers]

Conan O’Brien Tells NBC To Take Their Job And Shove It – Conan O’Brien is taking off the gloves, refusing to follow Jay Leno and host “The Tonight Show” in an after-midnight time slot as proposed by his NBC bosses. In a scathing statement released yesterday, O’Brien lashed out at the network and blasted NBC suits who told him Thursday they planned to move “The Tonight Show” to 12:05 a.m. to accommodate “The Jay Leno Show” at 11:35 p.m. [bostonherald]

China Facing Massive Bride Shortage – China’s “one couple, one child” family planning policy could leave more than 24 million men unable to find a bride by the end of the decade. The country’s leading think-tank describes the gender imbalance among newborns as the most serious demographic problem facing China. Luckily we don’t find this problem in Cape Town, where angels outnumber guys. [timesuk]

The Avatar Na’vi Se Scene Revealed – “Our friends at Movieline noticed that the sex scene between Jake and Neytiri that was axed from the movie is in the script Fox posted online. The Na’vi don’t have sex like humans—they have ‘the ultimate intimacy.'” [gawker]

Elvis Presley Would Have Been 75 This Month – As an avid Elvis Presley fan it rude not to note a milestone like this. It is for that reason that I direct you to Rolling Stone Magazine, as they take a look back at The King at 21. My God.. [rollingstone]

Rich Kids Gone Bad – A surprising number of today’s terrorists had affluent childhoods, including Osama bin Laden, his deputy Ayman al-Zawahiri, and last month’s alleged Christmas Day bomber. But they’re not the first to have tarnished the silver spoon they were born with. A look at little rich kids who grew up to be big, bad adults. [newsweek]

69 Murders In One Day As Mexico’s Drug War Spirals Out Of Control – Mexico opened the new year with what could be its most dubious distinction yet in the 3-year-old battle against drug trafficking – 69 murders in one day. The country resembled a grim, statistical dart board Saturday as law enforcement and media reported the deaths from various regions. [huffington]

Murder victim has face stitched on football – Mexico’s drug war reached a new gruesome low point when a murder victim had his face skinned and stitched on to a football. The body of the victim had been cut into seven pieces and left in the street. The football was found inside a plastic bag while his torso was found separately in a plastic container. Another box contained the rest of his limbs and his faceless skull. Mellow. [telegraph]

She’s Got Tiger By The Tail – I didn’t think it would be that funny when this arrived in my inbox, but I gave it a listen and I’m fine with it. I think you’re gonna enjoy this song – it’s pretty dam funny – all about Tiger Woods and his latest vibe. Get’s more and more spicy as it goes along. [youtube]

Hugh Jackman Heats Up, Cools Down Shirtless in Rio – I think some of the laydezz out there enjoy this guy. Not that taking one’s shirt off is a big deal. As you know, my bum shot from yesterday was very well received. That’s what the chicks out there want. Ass shots. Anyway, one of your favorite shirtless guys of 2009, had to strip down to cool off during a dip with his children in Rio and here are the pics.. [popsugar]

[thanks paul, brett, graham]