Sex tape or no sex tape, it is quite evident that SuperSport have a policy against male presenters boning anyone outside of marriage. This was made more than clear, via the following statement released yesterday on the SuperSport website.

“Finish and klaar!”

So there it is, “forthwith” and everything. SuperSport are a sharp operation and they will ensure a mood of fun and laddish banter. But let’s not let that take from the integrity, morals and esteem, which they clearly hold as most important.

Personally, I just love the way everyone who publicly admits to having an affair, tries so hard to get it to sound as cool as Bill Clinton’s statements he gave regarding the then alleged (and later confirmed) affair with his intern, Monica Lewinski, which included tales to do with a cigar and her front bum.

He went for the now famous, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.”

Watch him say it on video here. (How awesome am I being today?)

The use of the words “sexual relations” was very good for the time. We needed it. We were growing tired of the more specific words “sexual intercourse” and, to be quite honest, were not aware that it could be said that way. Or rather, what the EXACT definition was of “sexual relations.” So nowadays everybody that releases sexual confessions are doing it in their own unique, special, vague way. They make it “their own” to coin a phrase often used in American Idols. In that way, it not only avoids specifics, but it also makes you sound smart and reminds people of Bill Clinton and the fact that even the President of the United States of America did it.

Bill Clinton
The quintessential affair confession

And so, instead of making the statement in words that would come more naturally to Joost, like, say, “Ja, I pomped that fucken slut for years, my boet!!” he went for the more (perceived) clever and clinical –

I love the way that he needs to clarify what “liaison” means. Confirming with “not intercourse” in the second part, that they only really committed fellatio.

Nonetheless, he made the statement his own. This was his Bill Clinton moment.

It’s all in his new book called “The Man In The Mirror” (are you fucking kidding me that he went for that title? There would have NO DOUBT been chats with lawyers confirming that the current Michael Jackson fever “wouldn’t hurt book sales, Joost.” Simply stunning!

Watch Michael Jackson singing his hit Man In The Mirror here.

The Sunday Times examines the whole vibe (here) and includes not only details about Amor making a poo next to his car on their first date (I am not making this up – click here) but also confirmation that he was having an affair with his current wife (Amor) while still married to his previous life wife.

So, umm, ja, I don’t know..

Has Amor addressed this issue with Joost? I wonder if they have discussed the irony that their own marriage broke up the previous one? They must have, hey? While it all must be so hard on the family and it is, ultimately, a very sad story, the general public certainly do enjoy a bit of comeuppance.
It’s tied to karma, of course. That’s probably why we lost the 2003 World Cup. Thanks, Joost.

How many affairs in a row, do you think, would constitute a “trend?” I mean, it varies from person to person, right?

And IS this really Joost’s first affair?

Sorry, I mean second affair. Is this really Joost’s SECOND affair?
   
Joost van der Westhuizen’s book, the awesomely titled “Man in the Mirror,” is available to buy online:

Joost van der Westhuizen – The Man in The Mirror:

“Arguably the best scrumhalf to have played rugby union, Joost van der Westhuizen has created as much media excitement off the field as he did on it. From his rugby heroics to his marriage to the glamorous Amor Vittone to the recent sex-tape allegations, Joost has been constantly in the news. This title follows the careers of Joost the rugby player and Joost the man. A fascinating narrative of a rugby prodigy and controversial celebrity, it unearths the truth behind the allegations and counter-allegations that surround his life.”

BUY JOOST VAN DER WESTHUIZEN’S BOOK
“MAN IN THE MIRROR” ONLINE NOW.
CLICK HERE