Open your mouth.

Here you go – another dollop of amazingness that you can tell your friends about, as they slowly but surely get closer to “the vibe.” Scared that 2oceansvibe might eat them up whole. Well, they’re right. It will! But it won’t EAT them up, as much as it will DROWN them. In love. They are scared of the love that 2oceansvibe will DROWN them in.

Shame, bloody simpletons.

You know what G-Man always says, “If being drowned in love by 2oceansvibe is wrong, I don’t wanna be right.”

So here you go – In this clip, Michael Jackson is singing at his final rehearsal from his “This Is It” tour . He is performing They Don’t Really Care About Us – which is obviously quite weird for me, given that it is the song that I “gave” to him.

This Footage was shot on June 23rd, 2009 by AEG Live (the people that killed him).

So now, when your idiot mates tell you something new about Michael Jackson and you don’t really care; then you just say, “Oh REALLY, did you see the video of his final performance?”

Your idiot mate, initially speechless, stutters, “wh-wh-wh-what last rehearsal video?”

“You know, the one filmed a week before he died. At rehearsals. For his upcoming tour.”

“What are you talking about? There’s no video. Where did you see the video?” they’ll shriek.

That’s when you slide your sunglasses down your nose, perching them at the very tip. Then you lift your hand to within 15cm of your eyes, palm up but with finger folded over – and you analyse your nails – as though you’re drifting away. [A De Niro scowl works well when you do this]

“2OCEANSVIBE!!………twat!“

“Oh ja!!!” they’ll say. “But I went there. Umm. Is it co.za or .com?”

“Just shut-up. You fool. Just shout your mouth and get out of here.”