2oceansvibe Character and professional red-head, “Six Figures,” sent this in – asking if I had seen it and admitting that he is not on the cutting edge. No, Six Figures, I had not seen it. You’ve done well…this time. It comes as a great relief, following your last email with subject “brilliant!” with a link to a monkey falling out of a tree.

Dickipedia
Quality

Whoever came up with this site has done a tremendous job. Whilst certainly not as comprehensive as Wikipedia, it does carry a handsome list of subjects.

The person Six Figures referred to in his Dickipedia link, was none other than Russell Crowe. And on further investigation, I feel it is definitely one of the best. The Russell Crowe Dickipedia page includes such gems:

Russell Crowe

Russell Ira Crowe (born April 7, 1964) is an Academy Award-, Golden Globe Award-, Screen Actors Guild Award-, and BAFTA Award (whatever the hell that is)-winning dick. He is also an actor.
After establishing himself as a household name by appearing in such classics as Mystery, Alaska, Russell Crowe went on to star in every Ridley Scott film ever made. This includes Gladiator, a movie for which Crowe won the Oscar for “Best Mandals.” They really were exquisite mandals: strappy, all kinds of buckles. They’d be the pride of any former-Yugoslavian’s shoe collection.

Russell Crowe is an Australian. His accent, however, comes and goes, especially during films in which he’s supposed to be a tobacco industry insider. Or a hard-boiled NYPD detective. Or a Depression-era boxer. Or any role aside from drunk, violent prima donna.

Once again, with the release of Body of Lies, Ridley Scott has tapped Russell Crowe to slather yet another man-biscuit of a movie with his hot country gravy. This time he is paired with Leonardo DiCaprio, who has himself once again grown a nice little geopolitical thriller goatee-mustache.

Russell Crowe began his meteoric rise from poor man’s Mel Gibson to slightly richer but still poor man’s Mel Gibson from his birth on April 7, 1964, a birthday he shares with Ravi Shankar and Oates (as in “Hall &”).

Interestingly enough, Russell Crowe is not originally from down under, the land where beer does flow and men chunder. He was actually born in New Zealand, which is kind of like Australia’s baby brother—the one that wasn’t eaten by a dingo.

Born Russell Ira Crowe—that’s right, his middle name is Ira—to a pair of movie set caterers, he also claims to be part Maori, a warlike indigenous people known for its elaborate tattoos and choreographed fighting style, which often incorporates beating up innocent desk clerks with a telephone. He is a cousin of both Martin and Jeff Crowe, two of the greatest cricket players in New Zealand history. This fact would be impressive if anyone gave a crap either about cricket or New Zealand, except as a location to shoot an elaborate film trilogy.

After bouncing back and forth between New Zealand and Australia throughout his teens and early 20s, Russell Crowe—a high school drop-out—appeared on an Australian soap opera and in an Australian cop drama, but was spared the indignity of winding up in Australian soft-core porn by landing several roles in Australian shoot-em-ups. In 1992, Crowe starred in Romper Stomper, for which the Australian Film Institute awarded him Best Actor. This fact would be impressive if anyone gave a crap either about non-Academy Awards or Australia, except as a location for American dicks to go on their honeymoons.

[It goes on, with the same level of hilarity. CLICK HERE]

It’s genius. Pure genius.

Click here for Dickipedia and read up on some more dicks, including everyone from David Blaine to Pope Benedict and, not surprisingly, “Your Mom” (no kidding).